im some how missing my grandfather alot today

I'm sorry. You have every right to feel low and miss him. Just remember that in life you must still keep carrying on without letting things bring you down! 

Missing someone you love is pretty common no matter the time . I never met granddad , he passed away before i was born . I only had my grandma who passed away when i was 12 , i am 18 right now and i still miss her 

I came across this post on a day when I’m going through the same! I miss my grandfather a lot too. He was the best. I wish he could see how much I’ve grown up. I believe wherever our grandparents are, they are looking out for us❤️

Other

rest in peace grandma 

Loss

Lost my bade papa... 

3am Thoughts

I lost my mom 15 years ago, and i still miss her.

Mental Health

Did you know that flys are scary because there positions 

I miss how normal my life used to be before my father passed away

My mother passed away last year
And I still cry in silence 

Depression

My grandma is in hospital. Doctors said she might die tomorrow or the day after. She’s above 95 years. I don’t want her to die. She’s very close to me. And My Dad loves her so much Sometimes I am jealous of her. Sometimes she might be harsh but she always wanted her family to be happy. It’s like when they are with you you don’t know there value when they are gone you’ll realise and regret. She’s my inspiration. She’s one of the strongest woman I know. She’s never afraid of anything. I want to become like her. Love you Nannamma😍. I used to call her Queen Victoria👑. I’ll miss her so much:(

(Sorry if I made a mistake somewhere) I am not here really to ask anything or seek some kind of attention really. I think I just wanna vent everything out in front of PEOPLE. So today I'm feeling a little low, I spent an hour just now reminiscing over the last few years, locked in my room which got me to tears. Just sitting there thinking about my past since 4th standard. When, after celebrating  the best birthday of my life, just in 7 days my father passed away(due to a heart attack). And it was a really BIG shock, as he was a totally healthy man and had no prior health complications regarding his heart. Then the year after that was a Fucking roller coaster seeing his lifeless body in the funeral, coming back from where we were posted to Maharashtra (our real home), watching my mother and little sister go through that, I felt so bad for my sister she was not even in first standard when all of this happened she was clueless about what was going on, why was her father sleeping like that and not answering back during funeral. In the next year I saw the official things happening and all, watching my mother go through all the things dealing with all the official work, after his death and I slowly realized how great of a man he was even after his death we were able hold our position as high middle class family and how great of a woman my mother was still holding up the composure. Now my school life was of course ruined in a way and also not I guess. I actually am myself confused. Because I had pretty good friends whom I hold dear now. I don't think I hated my school life but thing is I lost, I think what we call INNOCENCE of the teenage and things we all enjoy during teenage. Like having a small relationship and not caring about the future THAT MUCH. I also liked a girl and I think she was also into me, we also flirted a bit but at the time my self esteem was really low I just kept front, a lie in front of others actually (Even at home) I thought why would she like a guy like me? what's so special in me?(Well I did exercise a bit and I was good at singing but my low self esteem fucked me) So, due to that nothing really happened. I just looked at her rationally I shut up my feelings by questions like the former ones. I was not thinking about that I am talking with her and getting happy over it. I had no INNOCENCE (even though I liked her). I was like, "heh in the end this is also going to END" and then I left it at that ( still I am not able to express it well by typing). Well, that was just one of the things among a lot of others ones it was just an example. Then the CORONA started. It was perfect to fuck me up even more. I got addicted to porn and mobile (it numbed my brain from all painful things kept remembering) for a short period (for around 6 months) but I stopped doing it after the lockdown ended. Then bam my 10th ends in 6 months after lockdown, then bam 1 year of 11th is now ended which brings us to now I still have a lot to hold upon my shoulders, trying my best to hold up, when not being able to hold up then putting up a front is the next option, watching my sister and mother cry once in a while, then crying by myself (I really can't bring myself to do that in front of them anymore), when feeling down reading religious texts and moving on, studying my ass off, sometimes remembering him, thanking all my relatives who were there to help us during that time (you know relatives are good people don't just bullshit them over just because they asked you your marks because they are the once who help in the time of crisis, not all of them I know that also) and pushing on somehow, tryna get something in my life. And in the distant future Being a reliable pillar for my family. (I might come off as an arrogant shit but sympathy is the last thing I want from anyone, and I also don't really think anyone is going to read this long of a message so let it be, I guess?)

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts