I’m so tired of waking up everyday. I just turned 23 and I have no desire to join society or take care of myself. I genuinely believe I’m not supposed to be here. I’m just an accident, a glitch in the system. I’ve been too scared to off myself but I feel like that’s the only option. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life working or dealing with shit. Nobody would really miss me anyway, they would just miss all the shit I did for them. I feel like I’m drowning lmao
first off, i respect you a lot for being able to move forward to reach your 23rd birthday. happy 23rd!
i notice that your thought has the tag ‘job dissatisfaction’ on it. i think you’re really strong, to be putting up with a job that’s probably causing you a bucketload of stress and anxiety.
you’re not a glitch, or an accident; and i get what you mean when yo usay that you don’t want to drown in work that you don’t truly enjoy or feels fulfilling to you. but life is valuable and precious; your life isn’t a book, so please don’t end it.
but life is also short. so don’t waste your time on things that don’t make you feel fulfilled or right. perhaps start searching for other hobbies. maybe go read a book, connect with your family, or maybe go out. i get the feel that you haven’t found your objective in life, and you might be feeling pressured because of it - but honestly, i think its fine to wander around in life and find little things that catch your interest. take a small break and do some self-care. its important to take care of yourself, in order to have that energy and motivation. i know its going to be tough, but i urge you to do so.
as a random stranger, i cant give you too much of any personal advice - i myself am still in school, and i haven’t had to deal with too much stress; i also recommend going to see a professional like a therapist, who can help you work out more of your issues. don’t feel afraid to reach out.
think about what the future could look like - or what you could accomplish, and the people you might meet in the future who could resonate with you and how you would miss the opportunity to meet them. if you feel like anybody is using you, just cut them off. you’re better off without people mentally draining your health and drowning you in stress.
all in all, i hope you feel better soon. you got this, warrior <3
🖤
