Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

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I’m new to this… So I’m sorry in advance if this is overwhelming.
All of my life I’ve been shot down. Treated like garbage, so much so that I kind of believe that there’s sound reasoning behind it. Every time I sought out help, to cope with everything going on around me it’s been dismissed. I’ve tried so very hard to put on a brave face and just ignore how I feel. I watched every one else trample on my emotions I assumed it’d be easy enough but it’s not.
Once upon a time I was happy. Mind you, it was short lived. My dad died, my happy castle turned into a nightmare realm where firebreathing dragons were nicer than my keepers. I found myself constantly at another person’s mercy yet mercy was never granted. I sought help, as my father taught me that it was not a sign of weakness but rather strength. But every time I was turned away, doors slammed and my hopes diminished. I struggled for years, turning misery into rage and positioning myself in other people’s battles just to spare them. And then I found a man, who saw through me. He saw the girl trembling, needing her own knight to come to the rescue. Save her from the hell that she’d been forced to trudge through.
I wholeheartedly believed I had made it through the war, brokenhearted and torn to find my solace. The light inside me faded quickly as I found that my trust was misplaced and time after time I was cast aside for yet another pretty little thing who knew nothing of the darkness. But I forgave, blinded by the light that I knew was buried deep inside his bones. My daughter was born, then another and a son. I had lived in a content fortress ignorant to all that lay outside my walls. Surrounded by a family of my own design that loved me as much as I loved them. Then the stones began to fall. One by one the brick and mortar chipped off and fell to my feet. Above a darkened night was coming and I tried my best to prepare. But how do you prepare when you’re unsure of what the storm will bring?

1 reply

You can never prepare for what the darkness may bring but you can always look for the light at the end of the tunnel. If you ever been on a broken road that has been abandoned, you notice that beautiful flowers still bloom on the once busy road signifying that even if something is destroyed, beauty may shine beyond it. You can never prepare for what anything may bring but you can always expect for the light and flowers to be there waiting for you. I know it is easier said then done but even if you may fear what may lie ahead, always know that you are not alone. People are always following behind you who know your pain. They may be even walking along side you as we speak. Just make sure to never distance yourself from the light. With darkness there comes light. Make sure to always try your hardest to stay in the light no matter how strong the darkness is against your fear. I know you can do it. You might not have the right equipment for your journey but it is a journey where you will triumph any beast in your path.


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