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Anonymous @crisp_buddy_5

I’m in a healthy relationship, but I feel like sometimes I’m toxic for her . Basically we are in ldr and we both came from different countries than each other so we both raised entirely differently. Sometimes it’s become so hard to communicate, to understand each other, make time for each other. Our most common reason behind fighting is our way of expressing love to each other. Idk abt me but she treats me entirely different from how I want to be treated or loved. And thus we always end up fighting . Well in this relationship she’s the one who stays calm and tries to make me understand but sometimes even she doesn’t have any idea what she’s doing is right or wrong and at the end I always have to let it go , and if she repeats the same thing again, then again I start fighting with her . I just really don’t know how to make this work cause I’ve tried more than enough to make her understand how I feel but she hasn’t changed yet. But I do love her soo much and I don’t wanna lose her ever so I just want the right way to make things work between us.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @bhavna_pande
3 replies

How u wanna be treated /loved

Anonymous @crisp_buddy_5

Prioritise me , try to understand things from my pov , respect my dislikes and the most important thing fear of losing me , like I’ve never seen tht fear in her of losing me. If I tell her ryt now to break up then she’ll just agree with me Instead of holding me back. I have decided to be with her forever and that’s the biggest decision of my life . Cause choosing her means to leave my family and once I leave them then I can’t go back to them even if we break up and still she can easily get off to me and I know for a fact tht she will.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @bhavna_pande

Bhavna P. @bhavna_pande

It’s clear that you deeply care for your partner and want to find ways to strengthen your connection despite the challenges you’re encountering.

Navigating cultural differences in a relationship can be complex and challenging, especially when it comes to communication and understanding each other’s needs. It’s commendable that you’re aware of these differences and willing to work through them with your partner.

One suggestion to improve communication and understanding is to approach conversations with curiosity and empathy. Take the time to listen actively to your partner’s perspective and try to understand where they’re coming from, even if it may differ from your own experiences or expectations. In life, sometimes the best things that happen to us are those that we never expected.

Additionally, consider exploring resources on cross-cultural relationships together. Learning more about each other’s cultural backgrounds can help foster mutual respect and appreciation for your differences.

It’s important to acknowledge that change takes time and patience, and it’s okay to seek outside support if needed. Couples counseling or relationship therapy can provide a safe space for both of you to address issues, explore solutions, and strengthen your bond.

Remember, relationships require effort and commitment from both partners, but they can also be incredibly rewarding when you’re able to overcome challenges together. If you’d like to discuss this further or explore options for couples counseling, please don’t hesitate to reach out.

Take care,
Counseling Psychologist Bhavna Pande


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