I’m being a complete jerk to myself. I’m lying to myself. I’m wasting time instead of doing things that I need to you. It feels so pathetic. No self discipline. A complete jerk. I feel like I’m destroying my beautiful life. Then there are my parents who are thinking I’m studying really hard where as I’m not. I feel so guilty. I have this one special person (not in a romantic way tho), that person asks me if I am doing my work but just to not get judged, I’m lying about completing my works. I feel so bad about all these. I know I can study. I have the capacity and capabilities but no I chose to fudging waste time in stupid things.