Im at a point in my life where Im 25yrs old female and weighs 104kg. The lightest I have been was 10 yrs ago. Im in a happy relationship my boyfriend is great, but I dont ever think Ive truly been happy with myself because of body. Im always so insecure whenever I see other females and always get anxiety that his looking (never once caught him). I do excerise, I tried dieting. You have no idea the lengths Ive been through to lose weight and mentally be happy with myself but then I just give up. Having pcos doesnt help either.
Sandeep @sandeep16
There is nothing wrong in putting up weight. Many people who are having overweight are leading a happy life, the only difference between you and them is the way you think. Don’t bother what others think of you, just go with the flow. And with your boyfriend thing, he should understand you and that what boyfriend means. Stay happy with what you got and we are always here to help and interact with you.
Hi. I am Shorty. I too, am overweight. I’ve never been an average weight. Societies - regardless of where in the world, tend to portray that if you are in double digits or your skin is too light/dark that there’s something WRONG with you but that’s not true.
Yes, exercising does help - the endorphins are amazing - my husband and I have been gyming it for like a year and a bit, its been good. When we first started, I said to my friend Zee that I wanted to lose weight so that’s why I was going to the gym but she said to me, “Go to the gym to be HEALTHY” because that’s why she was doing it. And she was right - just go to feel good about yourself. I must say, my shelf (butt) has gotten smaller and although we’ve been in lockdown; twice I might add - I haven’t put any more weight on. However, healthy doesn’t always mean just your body; its your emotions… your mind… and soul.
If I truly wanted to get “smaller” I’d have to change my diet but I like comfort food and I have to accept that I won’t ever get below double digits because of it and I am starting to be okay with that.
Happiness does not come from a body or some vision of an AMAZING body. Some of us, will never reach that. Reaching that size 4 isn’t always so fulfilling. For me, thinking about slipping into a cocktail, slinky black dress makes me smile, I won’t lie. However, I think about AFTER that. And the question that always crops up is, “Then what? Become a model?” Pfft. I’m 40. I’m 5’2" I don’t think so!! :D
Nothing about me is physically “perfect”. In fact, growing up, my mom would tell me every time I went to get a snack, “No guy will WANT/marry a fat girl.” I’ve heard that for YEARS and that is very hurtful to hear from someone who is supposed to unconditionally love you. I proved her wrong though! LOL Some crazy, ex classically trained dancer who was super shy with females, ended up with me. Some overweight American female… who was NEVER a dancer, who was NEVER physically beautiful. We’ve been together for 16 years (married 14 of those years) and we’re doing great.
Happiness - as far as I’m concerned, comes from within you; as a person. It comes from having an outlet; whether that be a person, a hobby, or a new career! And it most definitely comes from you accepting yourself; regardless of what you look like and what society says they think you need to improve.
Go to the gym; work out but do it because it helps you in a positive light; not a task that you HAVE to do because you feel that it will make you beautiful because really, you already are beautiful.
A lot of the society I’m living in says that you’re only happy if you’re skinny or even average people saying, “You’re fat thus lazy.” no, that’s not true. Don’t let those words drive you to get a gym membership or work out in general.
Start exercising for you - to be healthy or to continue to be healthy. Diets do not work because its sold as a short term solution; it has to be a long lifestyle change; a continuous one and if the “diet” isn’t built like that; then it’s for NO ONE to follow.
Be you. Love yourself with all your flaws and soon, you will see - everything about you, is loveable and not only that, you will truly be able to care about other people for it so its definitely a WIN-WIN situation.
I hope my story and words help you out.
Regards,
Shorty C
