I’m an introvert. I have a small circle of friends and they are my only friends. A few months back,my friend told me that she’s stressed and depressed and due to that her skin colour is getting dark. And she hates that. I mean she hates her skin becoming dark in colour. For me,this is a sensitive topic. I’ve a dark complexion. I have heard a thousand of times that a particular cream/lotion/powder can make my skin brighter and fairer. This is a not new thing for me. I have heard a million of times that home remedies can make me look beautiful by changing my skin colour to ‘Fairy white’. But that day,when my friend said those things it shook me. I had never imagined my friend to say something like that to me. I just had one thought. If she can’t even love herself in that colour,how can she love me? For me, acceptance is a great deal in a relationship. If she can’t even accept herself,how will she accept me? I was hurt. I felt betrayed like she’s been acting to love me for who I am but in reality, she don’t even like my skin colour. After that, I’ve been avoiding her. Rest of my friends are in good terms with her.And I don’t have any intentions to ruin that. But they are insisting me to patch up with her. And I’m not able to do that. Maybe because I’m hurt. This incident is disturbing me for a long time. I feel like I’ve been fooled this whole time.
There are 2 perspectives to this.
1. It’s my choice in which shade I want to be in. It’s my preference if I like Fair or dusky shade.
2. I don’t like people who have a dark complexion or I prefer them to convert into fair skin by applying certain products.
Now, I believe your friend comes in the 1st category because she doesn’t want her complexion dark. It’s her skin and it must be her choice as well. She is in no way linked to you or your complexion. And she told you because she is your friend, right? Because she wants to share with you without the intention that you will be hurt because you have a dark complexion.
If this thing hurts so much, it’s better to ask what she meant rather than assuming and then maintaining your distance from her. She should at least know why are you doing it, don’t you think?
Tbh, nothing works on skin. And there is no need to change the color of skin. Why should we? We were born like this and we need to accept it and show others who try to demotivate or call out such people. 😀
Thank you so much…I think you’re right…and I’ll work on it.