I’m almost a month clean of self harm. I guess that’s good! I really miss her so much I hope she’s doing well I don’t know what happened she just stopped responding I miss her 

Exhausted

I cutter myself again. O don't know why it was relieving 

Suicidal Ideation

I have scars yeah! Better than having a grave...

3am Thoughts

I've had enough of everyone and everything. I can't keep calming my hurt soul by self harm. Should I just do it instead and end everything once and for all ? 

Self Harm

for a while, i've never been able to make myself bleed through self harm

and for a while, it was the reason i was depressed.




allow me to explain

i've been dealing with depression since i was about 9, and i got to the point when i was about 10, almost 11, that i wanted to harm myself. this was around the time where i started having a lot of trouble eating, and body dysmorphia (around this time i was also figuring out my sexuality and gender as well). 

but i could never get myself to drag a blade across my skin.

i was paranoid my parents would find out, and i knew it would hurt. 


but i wanted it to hurt.


needless to say, i resulted into banging my legs against wood to cause bruises, 'accidentally' cutting myself against wood on my hands, and starving myself. i've lost almost 50 pounds (if i count it going up and down)

but i could never make myself bleed. and it drove me insane. 



Depression

How do I help someone who indulges in self harm?

It’s so painful when people cut you off from their lives. 😔

Breakup

Several attempts later I lay here in my bed trying to stop myself from not slitting my wrists up again 
But then I realise even if I do no one really cares 
Atleast this pain will go away

I have this big scar on forehead due to an injury when I was a child. I dont like to talk about it. It brings back bad memories.

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