I woke up at the sound of my alarm in a Sunday morning. I forgot to turn it off last night. I quickly got back to sleep because it's 8 in the morning and I slept nearly at 3AM. After more or less 30 mins., I wake up crying with my dream. I thought I'd forget what I cried my heart out in the middle of the night. This Father's day is really hitting me. I wanted to send Mama a message that I'm sorry our father left us. I wanted to ask the Muslim association here in our country to find and bring back my Dad, forcibly, if we could, for Mama. It's impossible, I know.

3am Thoughts

I wanted to stay with my grandmother only she's there really understands me and care about me a lot .... But couldn't stay because of a lot of problems... Why I don't have anyone close to me who can stay with me 😔💔
Today was a real bad day 

Depression

dear mom, is this the sorrowness you felt when dad left us?

Family

My boyfriend lost his grandmother today. And we are in long distance. How do I comfort him? What do I say? :(

Boyfriend

Am I wrong for finding my grandma's dead funny?
Now here me out:
Yesterday I had a funeral. My grandma died, I wasn't sad since we weren't close at all. The entire time I tried to control myself not to laugh or smile cause my family would start judging me, and I wouldn't blame them for doing so. I don't feel any kind of remorse for the way I felt even tho I know it's wrong. Now, I wasn't feeling sad for my dead grandma, she was an awful person and mother for her kids, but I did felt somewhat sad for my mother, aunts and uncles. When we were at dinner table I literally started laughing hysterically, now don't judge for laughing like this, I was making jokes with my uncle and I usually burst into hysterical laughter very often and I usually end up crying somehow so that was my excuse for laughing in that moment.

Loss

This discussion goes upto a very different level and so am not able to express it out to anyone in person, though it has a very valid and practical point of view according to me, but it is emotionally and socially extremely triggering when it comes to talking to someone very close to you. Another issue is, I am just in my late teenage. 
So recently I lost my maternal grandmother and I had a breakdown. You would find me very rude when I say that I am happy for her that she passed away and sad for all that has come to me from her 'unintentionally'. 
I now feel like not having kids in future. It's not because I don't like children or neither it's because I fear labour. I curse my heredity for this thought of mine. 
From my paternal family I have the issue of hypertension and a chance of being a slight issue of paralysis (not sure). But from my maternal side, it's a huge family of diseases that is ready to engulf me anytime. 
So my grandma who passed away, I have always wondered thinking of 'how she survived for so long?' It's because, she had been through 3 accidents which led to 3 rods in her body replacing bones. She had survived through 4 paralysis attacks, and 2 major and 1 minor strokes. And all this she had survived with a hereditary linage of 'diabetes'. 
I just feel like, I don't want to create a faulty population similar to me. And also I want to know what you as a reader think of it.. Like am I overthinking or something like that... I don't know, but it's really important kind of. 
So feel free to give your views on it🙂

My grandma passed away today. She left our family a few years back and took an oath to be a monk. She was with their group for the last three years. She was in her 80's and this winter really made her very weak. You know, how as a monk, you need to follow a set of rules. I've been a very emotional state today. She suffered a lot. Even when my grandfather was there, he never treated her right. He had no respect for her whatsoever and that used to really bother me. I just wish she hadn't suffered so much. Would have been less upsetting if she went peacefully. 

Its being 9 hours now i lose my grandma in my hands it was not the age, I feel empty writing down my feelings coz i want to, she was so important gem of my life which i loosed, idk how will i digest this fact that she is no more, she's in the next room waiting for tomorrow morning I wish i could have make her alive because she wanted too, tody her body will be burned she will completely vanished this is making me hurt my mom is crying from past 9 hours she tried her best but we couldn't save her. And this night is going so slow, hope she's happy with nanaji, and she is alive ik

I feel lost one again. 6 months since Papa passed away, I was just starting to be happy again. I started school and told myself i'd be more studiuos and make mg family proud.

Until yesterday we learned that Daddy, my grandfather has passed away. He was already of old age (84) but still...it hurts just the same. We'd have to go through the pain one more time. I don't want to do anything. I just want to sleep, and maybe wake up next to Papa and Daddy :((( why is life like this for me? 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts