i think i should just disappear so i wouldn’t be a problem anymore (:

Depression

I wish i could vanish from this world.

I don't need to live here any more.

I'm done.

3am Thoughts

I feel unseen in this world. So alone. Talking to my mother usually helps but sometimes even she doesn't understand me.

I have had my heart broken three times. Even when I was a slim and popular girl, I was cheated on. And now I have epilepsy - thanks to the aftermath of suicidal attempts, and PCOS which makes it impossible to loose weight. 

I know I'm not physically attractive to a lot of people. But was that all that matters? Does my heart, personality, and devotion mean nothing. I'm at a loss for words. My heart aches. 

I wish I would disappear. How much longer can I  speak and not be heard.

I used to feel sad but now I just feel numb. I have people who I love more than myself and they have so many expectations from me and I don't want to let anyone down but in all this I've lost myself and now I'm too tired to look for me again! I'm 21 and I'm already done with this life!! 

Lonely

Idk who wants to hear this but.. Stop giving your energy to people who make you feel like shit!! 

Growing Up

I'm not at my best. Wanna stay away from any human contact which is not possible. Should I go for a run? 

Conflict

**ever depressed n angry**
I dnt knw how I ended up here but I feel like d most misunderstood person on d face of earth n I really want to be heard but there is no one by my side.
Its been 4+ years of marriage n 1.5 yrs of being a mom.. but I have never felt so alone..that I wil end up having a monologue on a site I juz came to know bout.

I need help, this is to vent because it’s 4 am and no one’s awake. I can’t feel anything right now, I’m completely empty, there’s nothing going right. I’m at my complete lowest. I just don’t want to live, there is nothing worth living anymore. I don’t have anything, I don’t want anything, I don’t have any goals, I don’t have any feeling. I just don’t want to continue living, I don’t want to keep waking up, I cry every day. I feel so numb. don’t know how I can live anymore with everyday being the same. I can’t stand it, it eats me alive, I can’t stand looking at food, I can’t stand consuming it will every little calories going down my throat into my stomach contributing to the rolls. I can’t stand walking, it’s so embarrassing, I can’t even stand breathing I hate it. I feel nothing. Nothing but sadness and embarrassment. I feel like I want to throw up every single second. And going back to school will only make everything 10 times worse. The only reason I can’t bring myself to end my life is people will cry and miss me even thought I think everyone hates me I know somehow people actually do care about me, which sounds cringe but I can’t see anyone liking me as a person romantically, physically, emotionally, I can’t see it. I will never comprehend it. I’m such a disgusting, fat, ugly, person. If you’re wondering a little bit of what my situation is I have a skin condition that hurts like hell to the point I can’t sleep at night, I’m constantly touched, sexualized, and fat shamed from my brother who has anger issues, I hate how my body looks and have put on a lot of weight, many people have also fat shamed me like my dad who obviously doesn’t mean it but he jokes around and calls me a pig and says I’m fat but I take it seriously, and Im a loner who barley has any friends and have been sexually harassed by family members since I was little.

Eating Disorder

Why worry about things that are already happened and connot control things that are going to happen

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts