Thought

Anonymous

I think I have experienced some kind of negative mood swings. During the quaratine at home, most of the time, Id lock myself in the bedroom, not talking to anyone, this has never happened before and Im feeling really comfortable doing so. But then, I become a quick-tempered and gets irriated more easily, my mom and my dad keep waking me up every morning even though I dont need to, it was normal, way back then but now I just end up sparking some kinds of fights with them. My mom scolded for doing so and said she cried herself to sleep every night for the past few days, and asked why I kept on ignoring her. I honestly dont know what I am doing, I just need to be alone to calm myself down, and them, caring too much, just scares me. I know Im being a bitch and stuffs, but I cant stop it, I just really want to be alone by myself. Also, I had quite a few nightmares for about a week now, my sleep time is completely messed up, and I always wake up at 3 in the morning. In the daytime, I have the sudden urge to make myself hurt, like cutting myself, or slapping my face; I havent done them though but I think I want to try.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @banisinghvasir
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Profile picture for Now&Me member @banisinghvasir

Bani Singh @banisinghvasir

Hey,
I think this time, this very difficult and confusing time is having its own different effects on all of us地nd these effects might not be the most pleasant. It takes a while to cope with the effects of the lockdown/quarantine, to get used to whats happening. And really I think that thats normal because this is literally not something anyone anticipated to happen. If you can, try to just explain to your parents your feelings of wanting to be by yourself and to take your time to come to terms with things and that that doesnt mean that youre distancing yourself from them in particular. I think if they knew what you were feeling, they might be more understanding.

As for me, the first week or so were quite irritable for sure. It takes a while to get into a rhythm of things and routine. Honestly, getting into a routine really helps, the problem is that getting into one takes time and a tremendous amount of motivation. My work is my sole motivation and that is what keeps me occupied and somewhat enthusiastic too, in that sense.

If you feel that the nightmares and urge to hurt yourself persist, then you should consider therapy. An online session should also work well. Might be a great tool in these times to help you process your thoughts and understanding why youre feeling the way you are and how you can get better. Hope you feel better soon! Take care.

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