I quit my job and I hate my family. I do not want to blame others for how shitty my life has become, but my family is extremely dysfunctional and unsupportive. I am tired of pretending that we are one big happy family. I have always been the black sheep in my family and the older and more accomplished I am, the more they show their true colors towards me. I cannot help the family I was born into. The abuse I endured as a child, the neglect and the overall hate makes me feel terrible. I do not know how to feel. I just wish that I could move away and never talk to them again. I would like to start over and establish a new identity apart from them. I just don’t know how to.
Hi stranger! I read your story and trust me I have been there. I used to get abused as a child, even now as well. But apart from what you feel, I really think you should cut yourself some slack. Thinking about it over and over again is only going to hurt you. What you really need to do right now is, communicate, both with yourself as well as your family. Face it, we all have sinned and no matter how hard we decide to try and feel, it just won’t get right. Try talking to yourself when you’re alone, what you feel, what you want, and what you don’t want. Try sharing whatever is in your mind with someone like you, i.e. you. If you understand yourself, you are the only one who will opine yourself better than anyone. It’s your path. Later, try getting close to your family. This pandemic made me get close to my family. Know them, their perceptions, their feelings, concerns, etc. I know it’s going to be hard, but it will seem easy, once you reach halfway. Know that if you were in their place, and your kids would’ve been feeling that way, what would you do? As yourself, What would YOU do?
