Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

share your deepest feelings and emotions in a safe and supportive environment.

⚕️Depression

🧑Anxiety

😰Stress

💗Relationships

Create Thought

DepressionThought

👀
Anonymous

I particularly don’t know how to feel about today or any day in particular.
I have anxiety, depression(severely) and I have been to a therapist, got pills ‘to cure my head’ as said by everyone. Now it seems I depend on such pills to be happy or not feel anything at all. I am afraid of what is inside my head or what controls my emotions and feelings.
I have a great love life. I have a boyfriend who tries his best when it comes to holding me when I want to cry out and listening to me, sometimes, hurting me as because I get so deep in the anxiety and he doesn’t know the feeling, sometimes not noticing and I don’t blame him. Point blank, its hard for anyone to understand these feelings who haven’t gone through it or haven’t faced such in their life. I don’t blame him but I know I hurt him in the process to protect myself.
What makes me this way?
If I would be some superstitious being I would blame it on my past life or stars perhaps, but I am not, can’t even blame my pain to the non-existent realm as most people do.
I am the second child to my family. First being my brother.
What can I complain of? Criticism, humiliation, embarrassment.
Imagine nobody knows when you have a high fever even if you are right before their eyes saying it aloud and your brother being taken to the hospital because of a paper cut. Cuts?
I have slit my left-hand every time I couldn’t just bear the emotional pain for which I became the laughing stock of the family. My anger grew to my parent’s ignorance and my brother’s growing ego. This anger was tantrum and I gave up saying anything to anyone.
The story is deeper than this. To what happened to when I was five to today.
At some point I want to leave, never give up, but leave.

👀
4 replies
Anonymous

hi,
I can never relate to what u r going through . but if u were my sister i would say,U came alone to this place. to never give up is tough but u are brave. though u struggled you are able to speak out . what ever you have achieved, be it a tiny one ,u earned it. to hurt yourself for the doing of others is not the right and to harm them in any way is also not a solution. only remember your loved ones ,the close ones who are beside you ,who want you to be happy and safe. be for them ,be there for you.
your sis.

Anonymous

Hello i can totally relate to this brother thing i have an elder brother who like a baby to everyone more to that I don’t know why my parents think that i am strong and I will handle things on my own just because it’s hard for me to share, hard for me to explain. Even i have an amazing relationship everyone thinks that we’re perfect but deep down there’s something missing in my life. There’s a void I cannot explain. And if someone will see my life as a whole they will say that this void , this sadness is fake because according to them i have everything. Even my family is weird it’s like they care about mental health and at they same time they don’t do anything about it. I just hope one day it just stops

👀
Anonymous

Hello, thank you for sharing a bit (and a lot) about you. Somehow knowing I am not alone in this fight with myself gives me assurance that I can make it. There are things many don’t understand who don’t face it calling it tantrums, though I am now better at not saying anything and keeping it to myself, its hard sometimes right?

Anonymous

Yesss it’s really really hard

user_group_img

8494 users have benefited
from FREE CHAT last month

Start Free Chat
start_free_chat_cta_image