Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

I miss my ex.
She left me for some bunch of stupids.
When our affair started, she was married. She is also six years older than me.
But I fell in love with her.
I already had a bad experience with the girls of that particular state but then she convinced me by saying that she will inform to her husband first and then only anything will start between us. I was also amazed and continued with her.
We had joined a working place together and we used to live in the same premises along with 80 others (both males and females).
Then one incident happened and we had our first fight. PA of the Head of our working firm had shared her photos in FB. When she found that, she informed me and I was totally distraught. I asked her to remove that fucking person and call him and ask how the hell he shared her photos.
At that time, I was in the working place and she was at her home. It was almost 10 PM, when she informed me that incident and even after my appeal, she did not remove that fucking asshole. I was not able to understand why she is not doing it. I remain awake whole night and kept checking her FB but she did not remove him.
Then, she came back to working place and we had a fight about this but still, she did not remove her. I found and eventually understood that she is afraid of him, because he is PA to the Head of our working firm.
But I kept telling her and fought about this. Then, on the other hand, she stopped talking with me for that M### F####. Though she herself had informed me that how cheap that person is. She had also informed me once that “He (PA) had told her along with two more females working staffs that once a girl had told him that she will file a rape case against him and he had replied that, then I will do finger test on you”.
My ex has also informed me that she had ‘acute psychosis’, before our affair started. But I accepted her. I accepted her the way she was. She had informed me many harassment cases about her and I was always worried about her safety and wanted her to learn to stay away from perverts. But on the other hand, she started abusing me, blaming me and even threatening me.
After 8 months, she got a better job and she left this place.
Then, there was a lot of things going on this place and I had a fight with the Head of this place. Once again, that type of incident happened and she started defending all those shitty people and started abusing me, my family and everyone related to me for them.
Things went so wild that she filed a Police Complaint against me.
Even then, after 6 months we reconciled but she had become worse. She had given divorce to her Husband. During that time, I went through a lot of depression. I had suicidal ideation. I became a chain smoker and a lot.
When we reconciled, I had thought she would have changed and would have become better but she had become worse. Then, she started saying that she is a feminist and started saying all the hypocrite things of a typical stupid feminist.
She has a problem with everything in the society. She does not want any child, does not want to cook or do anything for the family. But she did not have any courage to speak anything against her bosses, even the bosses of her previous working place, where I was still working.
Things gone beyond my thoughts and I stopped talking with her.
I know that I should give up on her but I am just not able to. I still thinks that she will realize her mistakes once and come back to me. But it’s more than 7 months that we had talked and more than one year from the day, we had any peaceful conversation. I rejected marriage proposals arranged by my family, just for her but she left me for all those fucking bastards.
I still thinks that she will come back but my time with her taught me many things. I found that she is Narcissist, she has never accepted her mistakes and she will never accept her mistake. Even is she accept her mistake once, next time, she will come up with different version and totally reject her mistake and find someone else to blame.
Her Mother died last year, and that was the last time, we had talk in a little bit peaceful manner. But then again, all those things started and I was not able to take more.
It’s been more than 7 months, she had added that fucker again and stopped talking with me for him.

Someone please suggest me, what should I do?