Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

I love my boyfriend with all my heart but I decided to stay instead of moving to be with him because I also love my job and the life style I have and I’m torn between the two and it’s hurting us so badly. I love him so much and every time I think about like with out him it hurts and I cry a lot like a lot. But I totally understand that because I’m not with him is forever waiting on me. It’s going to be our 9th month together and it may be our last one and I fear that so much. Like I want to stay until the end of my job next year. And I my takes up most of my time, and lately I haven’t made time for us as much as in the beginning. And that is taking a toll on us. I just feel lost like I want to be with him but being with him means a huge change that I don’t feel ready for.