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i lost my grandmother a few months back.
She died due to cardiac arrest. It was so sudden that none of us in the family had anything to think about. In the drop of a hat, she passed away. Everyone said it was a pure death. I agree, for she was also so pure and so loveable.
But idk, we aren’t over it yet. I can’t seem to move on. I can’t seem to accept that she is gone now(as i was very close to her, we all were). I can’t digest the fact that it actually happened, death happened. I obviously feel very sad because of it. But also the fact that is haunting me ever since is that i wasn’t there when she left us. I was not at home. I didn’t see her the last time she was alive. I couldn’t help her in her last moments. God, we didn’t even know those were her last moments. We just thought it’s a random diabetes problem. And on the top of all of this, the last thing i even said to her was ‘bye’ as i was going somewhere.
I don’t know what I’ll do without her. She comes in my dreams, and all the dreams are about that she’s alive again, about she having a rebirth. And i can’t take it anymore. Those memories are haunting me now. Her absence is making us feel so void. I want her back. I can’t have her back. But i really love her and miss her and i need something to hold on to. I don’t want to detach but i also want to set her free.

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5 replies

Avni @avni

Take all the time to process your grief. All of what you are feeling is completely valid. Breathe compassion into the parts that are hurting right now. Understand that this is a process and will take time.

Gaurvi Narang @gaurvinaran...

I am very sorry that you had to go through this. I hope you can find peace and stay strong.


I can relate to this on a personal level. I lost my grandmother to breast cancer a few years back and I was young. I just keep wishing that I should’ve spent more time with her. I still miss her and I think about the fact that how great our bond would’ve been if I would know her now, when I’m old enough to understand her.


Please take your time to grieve ! It’s okay to feel the emotions you are feeling ! Take your time to move on.

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Simran Patel @simranpatel

I’m so sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace. Stay strong and take care.


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