Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

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Anonymous

i just wanted to rant here about my life recently. i keep having doubts about my friendships with other people. i want to trust them to much but for some reason i cant. i feel as if i’m obviously not good enough for them. if they dont laugh enough at a simple joke i feel self concious and start having negative thoughts about how i’m probably annoying and stupid. and i’m just so worthless sometimes. i have a depressed friend that i can’t even get to stop cutting for a day. am i that stupid? i want to help them. i want to tell their parents so their parents can help them out, but they dont want me to. i feel as if im not supportive enough to keep them from cutting. and i know i keep switching topics but i keep having more and more body insecurities. i hate the way my body is. i feel as if i’m too fat in certain spots and that no one will like me for it. and, last subject change, but i’ve been getting really nervous about things lately. i get so nerbous with public speaking and stuff lately. the other day i was told i had to speak in front of my church. before i went up i was sitting in my living room shaking a bit while crying about it. i cried later right before i went up, i was so nervous. and looking back on it i feel like such a baby. am i overreacting? and before that i had to do a presentation for a class. while i was up there right before my turn to speak i was having trouble breathing, i was sweating and getting a bit light headed. i got so nervous about it. i dont want to tell anyone i know in real life this because they’ll see me as weird.

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2 replies

Prem @prem

Hi dear
Few days back I had the same feeling and still today I ain’t completely out of it.
I got an old friend of mine with whom I discussed this and guess what: she told me I am completely fine the way I am,she had seen a bright side of me when we used to work together.And she told me that because I went through some unavoidable and embarrassing circumstances I started self doubting myself.
And this self doubt took me to a point where nobody from my office actually offended me but I ended up tendering a resignation.
I took back my resignation after my team lead had a talk with me and there I realised it was all my thinking while the employer really wanted me.
I want to tell you the same thing: don’t believe everything your mind tell you -specially the negative talks.
Watch your thoughts and immediately stop or reject them when they start telling you that you are worthless.
Promise me you won’t give up and for now please practice mindfulness from below link that will help you discard negative thoughts from your mind:
http://icallhelpline.org/4-self-help-techniques-for-when-you-are-stressed/

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Anonymous

thank you so much :(( i dont want to seem babyish, but i started crying while reading your reply. i didn’t know strangers could be so supportive. i tried using some of the methods a couple minutes ago as i started feeling anxious for no reason again. i found that the 5-4-3-2-1 method helps me a lot. again thank you so much :) ❤️❤️

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