I just don't know what to do I've got the best person I need and he trusts me alot he never stops trusting me and he never leaves me I've been not real to him I've been talking as someone else with him but I do love him so much more than I do myself and I've never been any less to him I loved each and everything moment with him but at a moment he was like finding out what's going on btw us but after i was about to explain him he literally was like "IDC who i was talking to the person I loved is u and i believe u exist" they way good he is kills me each day sometimes I feel to end up my life for ruining his life but I am so really thankful to him to bring happiness and joy in my life but it's not real me and it's not a real relationship but there is only love from each other which is true idk what to do idk hoe to make him understand all i want is him to be happy and away from a person like me what should I do......?

Love

Theres my crush in my class, we are also there in each other's contacts, but today i am unable to see his dp. He must have deleted my contact 🙃 but why? We played games together in school last time, and also had fun. Maybe he didnt like me that's why...
What do y'all think?

3am Thoughts

Just want to share something that I cannot with people i know.. I don’t know if i am looking for any advice or just wanting it out. I am a very happily married woman with 2 children until last year when i got back in touch with my ex. He was my first love, i loved him with all my heart and it was with him that I understood the meaning of love.. we both are from different religions.. i was ready to give up everything for him then but things didn’t work out and we parted ways. I married and moved to a different country and was never in touch with him. Last year i just received a message from him and things got back between us.. we started chatting long hours and hé showed me care and gave me all the attention in the world.. He made big promises that we can have our own little world without coinciding with our reality.. he is married too.. i went with the flow and I wouldn’t blame him because i kind of wanted it too.. slowly he got busier with work and hours reduced to minutes and now it sometimes is just a good morning and good night.. he is genuinely busy with work I know that but all i want is his attention and some time for me which I know is never going to happen.. I don’t know what i am after and what this holds for me.. I keep waiting for his message all day and night and he barely messages .. sometimes he does but there are always other things more important than me.. i am exhausted emotionally.. i am wrong I know that but i am helpless regarding my love for him.. i get anxiety if I think of losing him.. just feeling very sick of this situation i am in.. please don’t judge me I have no one to share my life situation with 

Anxiety

Finally.. I left messaging him.. It was like I was begging for love.. He didn't say a word.. I tried many times to make up again....one day he would talk better and the next day he would be like I can't tolerate.. I don't wanna ruin your life.. I just can't workout with the relationship.. So finally after forcing him... I left messaging him today... I don't know whether I did it right or not.. Prr I was feeling like I beg to get what I deserve.. I have done a lot for him ..so much that he can't imagine... I just asked him to take out 10 min to talk to me the entire day 
..he couldn't do that... I didn't want to force  him again for this... I was the one who was working to keep relationship going on.... I compromised everything 
..i surrendered my everything.. Just for this??? I know it's very difficult for me to live like this.. I know I cant survive... But this would show me my worth.. My intentions were always pure.. I don't want to lose him.... Praying to God everyday.. I can't imagine without him... N he s sitting tension free.. Roaming.. Enjoying his life.. I didn't knew whather I have done right or wrong... But I knew that I can't force him now... May God bless him with the eyes that should see whatever I ve done for him... N may God help me get back to him 🙏😔

Knowing someone loves you but can't love you right is the most torturing and heart shattering feeling. He loves me when we both are close, he loved me insanely before. But how can he hurte knowing I'm getting hurt with his behaviour. What does it mean he doesn't love me. For a sec I'll take that as a answer, but he comes all of a sudden and makes that answer vanish. He says he don't want to see tears in my eyes. But little did he know that i cry every night just because of his ignorance. He isolate himself when things get bad. But what about me? He never thinks of that. 1 year is a big span to invest ourselves into a relation which was beautiful before but bitter present is making all good things sad. I love him with all the care and affection i have but how can he keep himself away from me every time. Long distance sucks. He brought someone else in frame. But told me every time I'm yours and love you like insane. I want future i want time to clear this mess. And he can block me but can't avoid his colleague in this frame. Reason still unknown, and I'm exhausted with this all. But it's never ever easy to keep things straight. Cuz i have always been a person with good heart i never ever did anything bad to anyone. But always when i invest or get myself close to someone friends and family or specials god take them away. Why me?? 

I don’t know where to start. I was in a. Relationship 4 years back. I deeply loved him but he slept with other woman. I was devastated. I was broken. I got admitted into hospital bcz of heart attack. But somehow after some month I picked myself up and Moved on. I didn’t love anyone after that. Then, this boy came into my life I will name him Trk. Trk made me feel the love again, he made me believe in love again. I couldn’t help myself but to fall for him. I love him like hell. I swear I can even die for him. I adore him so so much. But the question here is why? Why do I love him so this much? Because he did made me feel that he’s the best guy I could ever have. He motivated me, he loved me, he cheered me. When I am with him everything seems to be so happy, it’s like someone has glued a smile to my face. Everything was going so well. I never ever thought of any other guy than him. I never ever talked to any other guy but him.

Then, few months later, he started getting frustrated. He told me that it was his academic pressure, his family problems… but the problem was whatever happened he always finds one solution that is to cut off his contacts with me. He too was in a relationship before me. Some days back we fought and he told me the next day that he hasn’t moved on yet. He doesn’t love her but he has not moved on. He told me that he tried to love me but he couldn’t. Really? All this time he was trying to love me? He showed his mumma my photos, everyone in his family knows about us but he said that he tried to love me? Honestly, this is not the first time he has broken up with me. There are plenty of times that I can’t even remember. He is so short tempered. When he’s angry he doesn’t see anybody in front of him. He always tells me one thing “Let me be Alone”. We fight, we break up, and after sometime he again texts me and I go back to him without even showing any kind of anger or something. I do it because I don’t want him to suffer from any kind of depression trauma, I just want to be with him whenever he needs me… So that he doesn’t think that he’s alone. I am afraid if anyone will be able to handle his anger. I don’t know why do I love him after all the pain that he has given me, after all the sleepless nights. One thing I know about him is that he has never talked to other girls instead of me. He has never cheated on me, over tracked me…never. i texted him yesterday because I had a fight with my mum and I was very sad. But he said that he was not in a mood to chat there was some family problems of his. I told him tht whenever he needs me I’ll be there. If he wants he can talk to me. He said he don’t want to. I text him again today asking if he’s feeling better… he asked me why don’t I understand. Why don’t I just leave him to be in peace… I said sorry and blocked him.

Well! I know that I have life, I have other things to do, I need to focus on my studies,career &all. I literally know everything. I myself is good at psychology. I am the one in my college who helps people to Fight depression, anxiety. But I don’t know how do I stop myself from texting him again. I don’t know what to do… I don’t know how do I face the reality that probably he never loved me… I was his attraction that’s it. I feel so low, also my mother doesn’t talk to me… I don’t know how do I console myself. I can’t tell all this to anybody that’s why I am sharing here. Can you please give me some practical advice? Please. I don’t know how to move
forward. I just feel so lost.

Depression

so my bf keeps avoiding me these days..and when i ask his friends if he's interest in me is over should i break up? but they always end up saying "he likes you very much, he is just depressed." idk what to do...my friends are telling me to break up with him but i dont really think im ready for one...


Breakup


#15..........I gave my first semester exams and went home for diwali. Though I had to return back after 4 days so it wasn't much like a vacation. I was feeling homesick and alone. I very thought of coming back to college in the crowd of unknown people or fair weather friends was sickening me. I missed my home for the first time since the first time. My flight landed and I took a cab to my college. On my way back just out of curiosity I did something that i have never done before. I downloaded Tinder. After swiping left on few guy I found someone who looked decent and without thinking much swiped right on him. The very next moment we got matched. I started talking to him over text. I reached college but all the while I kept chatting with him over text. Soon we exchanged numbers and after a week of just talking we decided to meet up..........(to be continued) 





My boyfriend and I want to get married after dating for almost 10 (on and off) but parents are making me choose between him and them. There is absolutely no problem with regarding anything just because he is my boyfriend they don’t want him . 

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