I hope in next life time the waiting could be short and the meeting can be a bit more longer❣️

Caregiver

Kabhi kabhi toh lagata hai.. agar tum meri jindagi mai na aayi hoti toh yeh sab nahi hota....

Tumne Aisa kya kardia hai mere sath jo merse move on bhi nahi ho raha.


Breakup

Can I get angry if my bf kept on falling asleep at the middle of our convo? I sure did the same last last week but it didn't even last a week. He's been kept me hanging for more than a week now. Do I have the right to get angry when I've done the same? He doesn't do anything tho since he's done with school and not yet on board. Yet I, who's been studying, is the one adjusting. 

Relationships

I still search for her in crowds and i wish to see her but then I remember she is not here, I lost her...

Lonely

Just want someone to sedate me so that for some moment there are no thoughts in my mind. Want to feel the calmness of mind. Just tired of this overthinking and continuous thoughts. I feel like going and having a drink of old monk nicely but it's a task to go to a bar make sure the bar is far away from where you live. 
So I smoke but smoking also does not help me. I never get that rush when I smoke, can't even smoke properly ugh!.  I can't smoke it in properly as if a lump is there in my throat not allowing it to go in just in the mouth and out. Makes me wonder as if I'll definitely have  mouth cancer (does not stop me from smoking). sometimes it feels as if I wish I were not there only reminds me of the time when I was small waiting to cross the road with my mother coming back home from school. I was tired of waiting the vehicles not stopping and I just went and bam almost go crushed by a taxi but he stopped it and I was not hurt much , but sometimes I wish should have ended there only as I grew up to be this loser and stupid person who is not an ideal son, does not have a good career and mostly confused.     

Overthinking

Okay so one fine do you just wake up and feel absolutely nothing ,you feel shattered,you feel destroyed,you feel nothing but the emptyness inside youuu keeps on haunting youuu again and again.Okay I'm having one such morningggg ! When you are already prepared for something since soo long and then one fine day when it took place then why did you feel bad,why did you feel sad,whyyy couldn't youu sleep thinking about that,whyyy did youuu cryyyy,whyyy wassss there a sudden breakdown in your heart,why did you think trice before typing again to the same person, why did you felt something horrible,why did you not like this thing, why did you not instead be strong??Ok i aint scared i aint broken down because something immediately took place ,i ain't angry,sad,happy,i justtt feel something that cannot be defined. How can someone be so sillyy knowing the fact that one fine day boom something like this gonnaa take place but still continued some pretty things that haunts me now for a sec . I don't really want to be like this i dont reallyy want to feel this pain i dont wannnaaa be sad because this is something that no one deserves than whyy me . Waking up to absolutely nothing is all what I feel like . For a second i thought i lost a part of me ,a part of me which was wholeheartedly precious to me .Does knowing about someone's happiness makes me feel jealous ?? (no) ..Does knowing about something' that was yours and the very next moment its not ,you never gonna have it feels bad ?? (100 times hell yess)....

Life

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar mnk

Affirmations

After got a job after long time , now neen in training from 2 days ,the trainer wanted us to be interactive , I'm an introvert , is not easy but I talk to people here n there as it's virtual , today the trainer says your not interactive all of as sudden , 
Being introvert for years has made me forget how to open up nd be casual conversation with everyone , just don't know how to do it 

Confusion

Rishtedaar..... shaadi kb krogi , shaadi kr lo ,shaadi kra do isliye.....🙄🙄🙄🙄

Samjh nahi aata inn rishtedaaro ke paise Khatam ho gye hai ya, Inhe naye kapde pehnne ka shauk chadha hai,jo shaadi ke naam par humari life brbaad karna chahte hai, khud toh shukun se ji nahi paye Hume bhi nahi jine dete...kanjoos log Ab sweet khane ka rupee bhi hum hi de??

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts