I have spent so much time trying to figure out how I could change myself to make things better, to make everyone happy, especially my friends. I’d blame myself, as if I wasn’t good enough. I wonder now why I didn’t love myself enough to stop the damage I was doing by thinking these thoughts. And I hate them for making me feel that way. The people that genuinely care about you don’t expect anything but your love and care in return. The rest are just there to enjoy the show. To put you down, to fill a void, to use you as a pitstop. Giving heed to such people is the biggest mistake I’ve made. To let their words and actions affect my well-being, even when I know I shouldn’t. I wish I had the courage to just say it to my friends’ faces that they don’t amount to anything and deserve to feel just as bad, if not worse, for putting me through what they did.
I really needed to hear this. SO TRUE.
Oh shit, I relate