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HallucinationThought

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Anonymous

I have posted this earlier but not clearly but im feeling like sharing all without being judged here…
Im 24 years old girl. Although i have many problems but abi me hallucination and ptsd k bare me baat krna chahti hu jo muje hote h bachpan se. Im just venting out here and need suggestions for my hallucinations and ptsd except visit to a psychiatrist bcoz i can’t tell anyone in my family abt it for that.
When i was in childhood…jbse smjne lgi hutbse i have seen my father use to beaten up my mother badly…like she is not a human. Bachpan me mujse koi galti ho jati thi tb bhi uske liye he used to scold my mother slap her for no reason…tbse ab tk me koi bhi glti nhi krti hu…bcoz i know ki uski saza meri mummy ko milegi…jese vo chahte the vese rhi hu bachpan se…
Tbse bs muje hallucination hote hai ki mere papa khi mummy ko…jb bhi esa lgta me bhaag k ko unki aawaj hallucinate krti hu…although ab papa utne voilent nhi h but fir bhi muje esa lgta h jese hi koi aawaj aati h me jake mummy ko check krti hu k she is okay naa…unko nhi pta chlne deti ki meri mental conditions ka…bs thoda relax feel krti hu unko thik dekh kr…or fir smjati khud ko ki sb thik h vo sirf hallucination tha…ab hr baar toh check krne se rhi na specially raat ko…although ab mere papa violent nhi h pr fir bhi abi tk bhi koi aawaj aati h or muje darr lg jata h andr se…me apne kaan p hath rkh leti hu and aankhe bnd kr leti hu…sb kuch vps dimag me gumne lga jata h…ab raat ko toh jake check bhi nhi kr skti na bs rote hue so jati hu soch k ki sb thik hi h…everyone in my family dealing with some mental issues but me sbko sambhal leti hu or khush rkhne ki koshish krti hu but fir me khud ko nhi smbhal payi hu bs… i really don’t know how to deal with it kuch smj nhi aata h kbi kbi toh mann krta h ki…
Plz ab yaha koi police ka gyan mt dena pls…muje mere mental prblm k liye help chahiye if u can…
Thanks for reading this post.

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21 replies
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Anonymous

Dost h pr me nhi krna chahti unse share kyuki me nhi chahti koi muje sympathy dikhaye…or muje or jyada helpless feel ho…kyuki sympathy dene k alawa vo log kuch nahi kar skte h.

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This thought has been deleted by the thought author
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Anonymous

Okay

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Anonymous

Ohh thats great. I also want to connect to u if u msg here without being anonymous.

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This thought has been deleted by the thought author
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Anonymous

Yeah

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This thought has been deleted by the thought author
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Ujjwal @ujjwals

Okay, this is a serious issue. You went through witnessing lot of violence with mom and that pain was beyond the limit so it grew inside you over time and bursting as hallucinations. My friend you won’t believe it but even if you share it will not go. You need both support and medicine for some time. I am not saying you have to take it for lifetime but watching lot of this mental issues i see you require care and medicine. I went through situation beyond this situation and yeah its possible to come out of it.

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Anonymous

I don’t able to understand ki kya kru ab…medicine k liye doctor visit krna pdega jo me nhi kr skti hu…and support well i don’t think isme muje koi support kr skta h… i could have share the incidents in this post but i just can’t able to write those…i dont know how i can overcome it…
You also gone through the same situation? Can u help me out…as I’m not avle to go to psychiatrist.

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Ujjwal @ujjwals

I will advise you not to share this with normal people because they might give you advice on meditation and exercise all that… But my friend meditation worsen this condition, meditation is only doable when mind is healthy. So never do independent meditation untill you get cured.

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Ujjwal @ujjwals

Yes connect me

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Anonymous

Yeah thank u so much.

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Anonymous

Okay

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