I have my exams. I miss my best friend. I left her long ago. I couldn't forgive her. I want to. But she never asked for forgiveness. Its like I value her soo much. But i feel she doesn't put what she feels for me in words. I just know that she loves me by her actions. Is it okay to go back to her ?. She is my happiness. It's like everytime to test if she values me Or not. I used to stop talking to her . She never asked me for any reasons. I used to not like that thing. I used to feel I am the one who is really interested this friendship

I think you should try to get her back. Don't have any regrets in your life , If she will come back that will be great but if not than you will learn something.

Friends

My friend, she's saying she doesn't want to continue our friendship. I asked her why... she said I just want, there's a hunch. It's for her to just go but I've attachment issues. I feel very heavy these days. 

Depression

Even though we cant be friends anymore ( because she doesn't want to ) cant i still care about her ? All this trauna and ocd is eating me up . If rhe problem is that i loved her too much and she doesn't want to be loved because of her past at least come clean . I told her that day that ok if this teasing went too far and i am hurting herby loving her and she said that "i deserve better" not someone with tainted past . But she should not do like this na . Emotionally torturing me , hallucinating that i lied all that time when we were friends . All that cyber bullying by getting grouped with those i used to call my friends but who were jealous of our closeness ....Trusting those who were not close over the one that cared about your health over his own 

Bipolar Disorder

Hey....
One of my friends, She cares for me genuinely as I think.but whenever she drinks she misbehaves with me.Not only that whenever she's around my energy drains low.I don't wanna hurt her by saying something as I know all her past secrets. She always reminds me that she is there for me but whenever I share my problems with her, she kinda starts shouting and judging me. I feel like she hates me in some sort and jealousy too.What to do? How do I say without hurting her?

Had a big fight with my best friend. I just told her that i feel were becoming a little distant and she got completely pissed off over it. I can't even express my concerns without being called toxic and immature. She even called me jobless, hopeless and that i have no purpose in life and that i should pray to god to find one. She said that it's now time she'll start pushing me away because she can't handle my depression and overthinking. Yes i sometimes overthink, i can't help it. It happens sometimes even if i dont want to and in this case i am not even overthinking, i genuinely felt we were drifting apart. I don't know what i was even expecting, I can't even stop crying now. 



Actually I am having a really bad day today controlling emotions with respect to my ex. 

I was in a relationship with a girl from 5 years from Jan 2014-Dec 2018. that girl was my best friend before getting into the relationship.

We had lots of ups and downs as usual in everybody relationship, but we coped up somehow. 

Many times the mistake was from my side like not spending much time, busy in office work, not celebrating together, taking sometimes for granted, not making her feel special. there was some mistakes from her as well to be honest. But majority from my side. this is what i believe.

I think in 2018, she had lost some toleration limit or feeling suffocated dont know, she had started feeling comfort or liking with a guy who was her friend from school and was best friend by then.

She had actually said she was liking him in may 2018 and also there was many instances where in there was lot of contact with guy. but me being very loyal to her, she was loyal to me i believed and believe her a lot, ignored it as it is very common to like your friends irrespective of gender.

Even when she said this thing our relationship was totally okay and had no recent crackups. then in october- november 2018, we had huge fight due to my mistake that led to our breakup in december 2018.

We both tried a lot to save it, although the duration and weightage of try was different. where in she tried a lot and i was not still hit by breakup from dec 2018 and jan 2019, where in i tried a lot from feb 2019 and march 2019. but nothing could re-unite us. we were broken a lot and we had our own sufferings.

my breakup pain was not that much from dec 2018-jan 2019 and was progressively increasing from feb 2019 onwards.

But i was shattered to knowo that she got in relationship with the guy as i told before who was her best friend. I was shattered into pieces. She recently revealed that guy was in madly love with her from long time (even when our relationship was going on)

Being single (still single) , I had tried a lot to heal myself - having a lot of best friends I share with them, went through therapy, went abroad and came back. I feel okay sometimes, sometimes i still feel not healed and I feel terrible, even its been 3 years since breakup.

Even though i am struggling every now and then and even though my days are horrible, I never wished bad for her and always wanted good. somedays she just call me and blast me off remembering past and blames me completely, even though she has a relationship comfort, she is doing very good in life and even though she knows i am struggling, even though she knows i am not doing good in life, she still called me and blamed me top to bottom. 2 times with 6 months apart.

Even after these, i never hated or cursed her and stayed away from her as much as possible to not to hurt her current relationship and for the good of her. i even not blame or curse her for moving on so fast or falling in love with another guy. i feel it happens. it may have happened subconsiously without notice of themselves.

Now a days i feel inferior about my ex and hateful thoughts have started in my head. Have thoughts like I am struggling and she is doing so fine. Its all of sudden to be honest, i never felt so all these years. Now after going through a lot and have tried a lot to move on and have felt little okay compared to previous years, I dont know why i feel like this all of a sudden.

To burn me more, i saw her and her boyfriend on movie date recently where i just crossed the paths unintentionally. I could not able to take it and mentally shattered. This happened last saturday.

I have a lot of responsibilities in life right now with respect to my ailing career, my problematic home construction and this incident wonders me- "will i ever move on"

I am sorry if i have made you feel irritated by my long story or any inconclusive sentences.



Breakup

so me and my friend have been friends forever and she recently has been overprotective when she sees me with other people and even saying she is going to hurt herself if I don't stop hanging out with them so I asked her what was wrong and she told me she had feelings for me so I told her ill need a day or two so she said ok. I truly liked her back but because of the behavior she had I can imagine what behavior she would have in a relationship but after a day I told her I liked her back but by that time she said she had a, girlfriend, i was shocked she introduced me and all so after I told her we should cut ties because she had a girlfriend. but she had so-called feelings for me she agreed to cut ties but after a few days she kept on texting me and showing up at my house I told her I was uncomfortable and could she please stop she did stop showing up at my house but she kept texting me from different accounts and numbers. I'm i the bad person?

Jealous

She was attached to me but I always thought it was a casual friendship and took it for granted everything is now ruined and now she calls me up saying she can't go on without me as a friend and her first priority is me. What am I supposed to do? I want peace in my life I tried to make her understand that it is just my personality but she says she doesn't care .she very possessive too .It's suffocating sometimes also she is very jealous of me getting close to this other girl she was about to cry talking to me. How is everything my fault😭😭😭my friends are telling me to tell her to f.. Off but I can't 😭

Realised it long ago , but thought to share it here, the school friend who I thought my best friend from my side  , the same she doesn't feel like I  am her best friend , it hurts but yes from my side it was pure and whole  and it was long ago after that i didn't spoke with ...

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