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Anonymous

I have come to realise that I am too sweet and innocent in a lot of aspects in life. I am shy, kind, I like gentle soft spoken people and do not know how to handle situations where I need to deal with difficult situations or people. When I encounter such situations, all I can do is cry and get upset about it. There are a lot of times when people have taken advantage of me due to this nature of mine. What do I do?

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Shruti @umanghai

•

Hello!
Actually, being kind and soft-spoken is a great virtue to have in various life settings, such as a professional setting, in your social and family setting, with your peer-groups, etc. In-fact, people who get agitated easily and are self-centered face difficulty in even maintaining their limited number of relationships.
Correct me if I am wrong in understanding you, when you say that you are a sweet and an innocent person and in past, have been hurt by a number of people, you mean to say that you had trusted these people a little more than you should have while trying to prove them a point that you are nice. If I have understood you correctly, I may want to further ask you to peep within, and answer to yourself the following questions about you:
Do you think that in the process of trying to prove to other people that you are nice, you are trying a little too hard to keep people in your life, and in the process have often gone out of your way to provide them with your assistance or help even when they may not have asked for it? Do you think that your this behavior may be stemming from your other fears… e.g. Do you think that you are afraid of being alone? or Do you often engage in self-doubt about your various abilities and capacities?
Please remember, being kind, soft-spoken, innocent and sweet natured are highly valuable soft skills. It is probably time for you to work upon your-self rather than tiring yourself in the process of trying too hard to make others happy.
You may benefit from a little help. Psychological Interventions are evidence based ways have helped many in seeing and understanding things with a greater insight.

I, myself am a certified clinical psychologist and run a psychological clinic.
You may consider directly approaching us at: email: umangpsychologicalservices@gmail.com
Warm regards

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