I have always been that person who was know to be cold and heartless, someone who has no feelings and especially romantic ones. I was the girl who would break the hearts of the guys I was involved with (I did not mean to do that but, I cannot force myself to love someone)
I spent a very long time like that. Until one day, I searched about aromantism, and I thought I was aromantic. However, this week, some weird things have been happening to me. I was getting lonelier every day. I longed for a particular person and that particular person was not even special. I just liked their presence around me. I know that my feelings are difficult to decipher and for 20 years I have never felt something like this. Now, I am afraid of loneliness, afraid of not seeing that person but I don’t want to see them. Even my body is rejecting these strange feelings, my heart is beating fast and I feel depressed, I sleep a lot and I don’t want to eat anything because I am nauseous. Deep inside, I think I know what I am feeling. Yet, I keep rejecting it because the person I am thinking about may be toxic to my independence , my self confidence and my perception of things. I am a strong independent woman, and I surely don’t need any kind of feelings to stand between me and success, what should I do?
Hey. I can understand. Don’t worry it’s normal. You don’t wanna lose control and that’s why you’ve never gained feelings for anyone. Because you’ve always considered them to be a weakness or something that could pull you back. I understand all this.
But. I wanna tell you that without feelings, we’re just robots. You should learn how to let go a lil and live. I know you don’t want anything jeopardising your success and you’re right, nothing should. But it’s you should understand that it’s possible to have a middle ground for this. You could be emotionally involved with someone and yet be independent and reach success. You don’t have to lose onto anything. I hope you understand what I’m trying to explain.
Waiting for your reply!!
Hey , it’s totally okay to feel whatever you are feeling and just know that you are not alone in this. You should research more about aromanticism and get to know a little more about yourself. Even if you think you are that kind of a person it’s totally alright to be that way . Other than that about feeling lonely , i personally think feeling lonely is as natural as being human. It is okay to feel lonely but just know you are never alone. You can always reach out here at least if nowhere else. And about that person , if you really have feelings then don’t run away from them . Just give yourself time and try to process your feelings and i know being in love or having feelings for someone is the most vulnerable thing to do and it takes a lot , but if it is for you , it will be all worth it! I hope you find what is for you . Good luck ! Wishing you all the love , success and healing, Take care ❤️
