I hate it how they all looking at me like that. I hate it how they all make me feel like I am an outcast. I hate it how they always blame me whenever something wrong goes on their way. I hate it how they always favored the other one without knowing what is the reason why am I angry at them. I hate it how they are all saying to me that I always push myself away from them but the truth is they are the one pushing me away whenver I want to talk to them or hang out them. I hate it how they all gave me their fucking fake smiles. I hate all of them. Fuck them for making my mother mentally sick. Fuck them for making them do this to me. Fucking family! I hate you! Fuck it. I don’t know what I should fucking do to my life. I have friends but they have so many problems that I can’t even let my problems out. I just… don’t know what I should do. Should I smug it all and pretend like it is nothing. They are my family why are they all doing this to me? Am I that sinful to fucking deserve this?
It must be so hard for you coping with these situations but remember there are always some things that will come in place after some time. Try to work on your own personality right now, rather than worrying too much about what others are doing to you as the situations are trying to put you down. But be strong and hopefully things will get better soon:)
I completely get how you feel right now. It got to a point that I wanted to chop all of my hair off and I was cutting myself… sometimes our family thinks they are doing what’s best for us but in reality, they are the ones making us feel so angry and like we are the problem. My dad is always on my mom and it sometimes makes her feel like she’s not good enough and she gets really depressed. They say we keep changing and start to criticize but they never seem to realize why we change… the real reason behind it… If you don’t want to tell them ok but just find a way to let it out… if you need someone to vent to, I got you…
Thank you I just don’t know what to do. It’s just that in our house in my mom’s family you know cause I am living n there and I am not close to my father’s family. There’s so many eyes on me. Like they are always had something to say whatever I do. It’s hard I can’t even trust anyone. They always like to talk behind my back. I just can’t tell my friends I don’t want to be another burden for them. I just want to disappear and leave. No one will care anyway.
We think no one will care but there is always someone who cares about us… theres an app called 7cups that really helps with people like us who find it hard to trust people… I feel like a burden to other people too I kept everything to myself but it came to a point where I made myself sick… Because I didn’t tell anyone about my problems and till this day I still dont but I try to find other ways to let it out so I’m not holding on to it…and yea it is a horrible feeling when your surrounded by people and it feels like everyone’s talking about you… for me I just had to realize that I was being insecure and punishing myself for my past mistakes… Ik what your feeling… and I’m here to listen and not judge if you need to vent, to let everything go…
If family stress you out so much, try to avoid as much as possible and interact with other people like your friends or people you work with or classmate or even stranger (beware of them though, know how to find good ones. you venting on this blog is a good thing). If you don’t want to talk about problem with them, try to spend time with them in another way like going for an outing. Relieve your stress. If you can’t entirely solve your problem, try to lessen them so you won’t have to bear the pain. Remember this: Nobody including you deserve to be in pain in this world. Everyone should be happy and comfortable with themselves. If people around you can’t make you happy, try it on your own. Try to understand yourself and avoid yourself from the things that hurt you. If you can’t, try to cope it well. Do something that brings comfort to you. Don’t mind the people who hurt you. Focus on yourself. You will always have the ability to change yourself.