I gave my best efforts for many peoples of family and friends in their good or bad time. But today I'm all alone just because I don't have any job and suffering from poor health. How unfair this world and destiny for some people. 

Lonely

I am sensitive especially towards people comments about harsh truth that involves me. I tend to get mad or make environment awkward after hearing those things. How to improve myself of this?

Mood Disorder

HOW DO I STOP 

Frustration

I feel lonely most of the times

3am Thoughts

I know I am going through lot won't be able to stop getting hurt, what else I could do ,you made my life miserable, throwed from Everest to ground.

Love

Trust the timing, things happen for a reason.

I feel the need to vent, and I support and welcome any comments and suggestions... I feel exhausted, like all the time. I'm 26 and I feel like I wasted my entire life already, like I know I haven't but it doesn't feel like I'll ever get to have the experiences I really want, like, I've never even been to a party, do house parties not exist anymore? Yea I know Covid has that shut down right now but still even before then. I used to have a good group of friends and we all hung out on Discord playing games and D&D together, but due to multiple reasons I don't feel comfortable playing D&D with them anymore and it's given me less and less of a reason to be around them. I like them, for the most part, but I feel so unimportant to all of them that it doesn't even matter I haven't been in the chat for like 8 months. My other group of real world friends (whom I only met about 5 years ago) I honestly cherish more than anything else, but I feel more like an outsider than their friend. I know it's probably wrong, but I feel like I only get invited to things as a side thought. I hate myself so much, and I think it leads to me isolating from everyone all the time, and I go through these phases of getting over that and hanging out with everyone like everything's fine and then I vanish for month's. I worry about the days where I finally decide to isolate myself from the people I know in real life, cause I for sure will kill myself... I'm not trying to cause alarm for any who are reading, I really am in a good place and honestly one of the best mental health stages of my entire life. But if nothing else, others would describe me as shrewd and to the facts, and I honestly believe if those days come I will kill myself, so I'm trying to figure out what I need to do to turn my life around to stay away from that. I like my job, but it could be better. I live with my parents, but I'm saving up to try to buy my own place. I have a girlfriend but that's extremely complicated right now. I'm so tired of being alone on weekends, but I'm terrified to ask people to hang out with me. I feel like I missed the "party" stage of college and high school and now I don't know how to go out and make friends. I started going to raves with my a few of my friends and unsurprisingly that spiked my anxiety levels to a point I didn't even think possible, like I consider myself a pretty chill guy, really laid back go with the flow, all cool baby, and here I am having literal panic attacks at a silent disco (for those who don't know its  a small silent dance floor and everyone is given headphones to jam to at their own leisure) and it doesn't help that I feel like an outsider even with the people that are there "with me". There's a lot of times I hope and pray that reincarnation is real so that when I die, I can get another chance and hopefully not fuck it up again, and I get this feeling of being stuck, like, I don't expect to die of natural causes for like 60 years, and I'm gonna try VERY hard to stay away from jumping off a building, if for no better reason than that if I do, and heaven and hell do exist, then I probably won't end up in the same realm as my kitten that I had to put down last year.... I'm not trying to write a sob story, but it hurt... And she felt like a reason for me to get my life on track and fix everything, I was actually extremely motivated to change for her, and then she had to leave... And now I have nothing.

Anyways I think that's all I have to say, I think it helps to just have my thoughts written down and exposed to the world, so feel free to comment or don't.

Overthinking

Ab toh 1 sun 1 hafte jesa lagne lagta hai tere in. 

Anyone who loves psychology as a subject?? 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts