i feel worthless. mainly bc my mum said i have no qualities. she said it in a way that was condescending and almost like everyone else is better than me and I’m just a piece of useless shit. I hate her and i hate my family so fucking much. istg one day I’m going to run away or kill myself. my dad doesnt understand y I’m so upset. he thinks i should be able to take ‘criticism’ well and not break down like i did today. no one understands me and i hate it. i feel like i shouldn’t have been born bc my parents act like im tying them down instead of acting like im a gift from God like they say i am. i want them to love me for me and they shouldn’t love me bc they feel obligated to bc I’m their fucking duty. god i hate them both so much. they make me feel like crap every single fucking day and idk how much i can take before i break. that’s a lie I’ll never be able to do anything bc I’m a fucking coward. i just wish i was born into a family that made me feel like i was worth something in their life instead of just another thing holding them back and just being a piece of added weight or something useless that, if thrown away, wouldnt be missed. i just want to stop feeling so negative and upset and have hysterical melt downs all the fucking time. and im tired of ppl not being able to understand me or at least just leave me alone instead of telling me to toughen up bc i should be able to take things like a grown up. IM NOT A GROWN UP IM A FUCKING 13 YR OLD GIRL WHO DOESNT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG W HER THAT MAKES HER OWN FUCKING PARENTS THINK SHES SO LAZY AND WORTHLESS AND USELESS AND FAT AND A PIECE OF STANKY SHIT. i hate everyone at the moment. especially my parents. and i just want to die bc that’s what they want too apparently. so yh this has been fun.
… u know I do understand you. That feeling of running away to an unknown place there u don’t have to see their disgusting faces, a place there u can be u, a place there u won’t be judged, a place where I can fucking BREATHE without caring about the shits. Or just be free from your parents and make them regret all the things they have done to you. Making u feel worthless and unwanted every single day. Making you want to kill yourself or pushing you down by their harsh words… I hate them I fucking hate my family too. Why can’t they love us the way we are instead of trying to change us or why must they fucking care soo fucking much about others thoughts than their daughters??? Why can’t they just understand that ITS OUR FUCKING LIFE AND NOT THEIRS???
I wish I could run away from them and everyone I know cuz I’m sooo fucking sick of them…
… I understand you too. My parents are asians and they are very pushing and they swear at me all the time and say those harsh words. I can understand you because I have been through it too. Some parents may say those words out and act angry but in their inner self, they don’t mean it and those harsh words are sort of like the things they say out of impulse and sometimes also they are under pressure and they don’t know who to express to. Moreover, this is sorta like the way they like to show that they want you to be a better person by pushing us to an end and telling us we are not good enough. If you feel really hurt by their words, try to ignore their words and not put them in your memory because in the end your parents don’t mean them and they love their child dearly. They just have the belief that saying those harsh, cruel and hurting words would make you feel like this is it I need become a better, trying and more industrious person. In reality, their belief is just a bit odd. This is sorta their way of showing their care and love for these type of parents. I understand you, try to understand them like I try to and it really helps and if you are hurting because of their words, try to ignore them or their words and do something you like.
