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ConfusionThought

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Anonymous

I feel so stressed. I’m currently in my entrance exams are coming phase . I don’t know where to apply . My father wants to send me to a private college, up and down daily but no I don’t want to go there , it’s fees is much more than the placement packages . For most of my life, I’ve been a good child. I meet my friends in a gap of 3-4 months and that for 2 hours or so . Because that’s the max time I get . My parents are not strict but a little protective. My father continues to tell me that I’m dumb and won’t be able to manage anything if I opt for hostel or a college that’s far away . He’s like you don’t know how the world works today . Murders hote hai, logo ki videos viral hoti hai . I am not against him but I want to move ahead in life . I don’t want to stay stuck . I want to learn things , I want to manage stuff, I want to cry about it , I want to feel homesick but still get up . All I do is study and have no other co curricular activities. I want to learn but I won’t be able to if I stay here for the rest of my life, dependent on my parents for food, clothes everything. Instead I want to get into a good government college , get into clubs I’ve always been passionate about but never really got the chance , I want to attend fests, make friends, find a way to earn and just learn. What scares me is that my parents will be all alone because they’re planning to send my sister to hostel since she is becoming a phone addict. Should I just suppress my dreams ? Idk .

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Profile picture for Now&Me member @bhavna_pande
3 replies
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Anonymous

Just focus on career coz this is the time to do it and see one day they will be alone that’s he harsh reality so.

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Profile picture for Now&Me member @bhavna_pande

Bhavna P. @bhavna_pande

I can sense the weight of your stress, and it’s clear you’re grappling with important decisions about your future. It’s commendable that you have a vision for your life and aspirations for learning and personal growth. Your desire to explore beyond your current circumstances is entirely valid.

It’s crucial to communicate openly with your father about your dreams and concerns. Share with him your passion for learning, the potential benefits of attending a government college, and your willingness to take on the challenges that come with it. Emphasize the importance of your personal growth and the opportunities you hope to pursue.

Help your parents understand that one day your college and studies will be over, and you will eventually have to face the world and its challenges alone—be it office, society, peer pressure, etc. Sometimes parents may not realize that by being overprotective, they might inadvertently be preparing their child for failure instead of success in the future. Success, in this context, includes not just material success but also emotional well-being and a life where you feel content.

Consider suggesting a constructive conversation with your parents to address their worries while expressing your own needs and aspirations. Finding a balance that aligns with both your dreams and their concerns might be possible through open communication and understanding.

Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your own ambitions while respecting your parents’ perspectives. Your dreams matter, and with thoughtful communication, you may find a path forward that allows you to pursue your goals while addressing their concerns.

And hey, if you need any other guidance or support, I am always here for you as your friendly counseling psychologist.

Take care,
Psychologist Bhavna Pande

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