Let’s set Realistic Resolutions in 2021.
Click here to know more
Home / Thoughts / I feel sad. It’s disappointing and heartbreaking ...
Anonymous

I feel sad. It’s disappointing and heartbreaking to see your own family seperating. I can’t fake anymore of having a perfect family. For me, my family has always been my top priority, no matter what. Friends are important but family comes first. But now it’s hard to accept the situation and handle daily fights and arguments.
Dad doesn’t earn well. He tries and work really hard. Mom used to love my dad. Dad’s frustration due to his own failure changed everything. I have seen my parents fighting and arguing since my childhood. But now it’s extreme. They barely talk. They don’t even sleep together. Mom lost feelings for him due to my dad’s aggressive nature. I have a feeling that she is having an affair. My elder sister is very sure about it, but I don’t want to accept the truth.
I love my dad, because he does nothing for himself. Whatever he does, he does for us, for his family. But not being able to earn well and facing failure, he has turned really aggressive. I have tried a lot to motivate him, but I guess it was never enough. I gave up because I couldn’t take his anger. His “I am always right” attitude. Sometimes I really start hating him but then again when I see him sad, I feel like hugging him tight and I want to let him know that I love him. I am closest to my mom. My sister hates her because of her affair I guess. I try to remind my sister about all the sacrifices my mom has done for her. But my sister’s childhood has been pathetic. She has suffered a lot too and now all these family issues is common to her and she doesn’t bother anymore. She is used to it. Everyone in the house (including me) cannot accept their fault. They argue and make excuses. I am tired of daily quarrels. It is said that talking and making proper conversations solves the problem but here no one is ready to accept that they did something wrong. They don’t want to compromise. I am also one of them! Is it my mom’s fault that she is having an affair? Maybe she got fed-up because of dad’s aggressive nature and she lost feelings for him. That way, I cannot blame my mom. She is a human too. But where did her humanity go when dad needed my mom’s support? She kept blaming him for not earning money. My dad hardly buys any good stuff for himself. He spends only for us. however, It’s my dad’s fault too because he was never ready to take my mom or anyone’s suggestions at work… he kept doing things which felt right to him. My mom used to support him but again she gave up.
Is this a very strong reason for my mom to stop loving my dad and having an affair? Being a wife she should have been loyal and she should support him.
Whose fault is it? How can I bring back my family together? I don’t remember when was the last time we all laughed together. We go for family dinner. But I have always been embarrassed in every dining place because my parents fight like hooligans. Every 31st eve my family creates a nuisance in restaurants. This year my sister left the dining table and she kept crying. Money has always been a major issue for most of our fights.
When can we have a proper family dinner where we four can laugh together and enjoy food? How can we four stop blaming eachother for every small thing? I am the youngest and I can’t see my family seperating.

2 Comments
Post anonymously?
Anonymous

Reading this just reminded me of my life! Ik it sucks I m d youngest too in my family my father is an alcoholic n he even had affairs in d past n bcoz of his wrong decisions he has also lost all of his money. My mother used to support him n love him a lot but bcoz of the affair thing n all she just has lost all faith in him. He never comforts us n all he cares about is his alcohol n his family which makes the situation even more frustrating. But still I can never forget all these good memories I have about him n I don’t want to even though, I hate him fr destroying my n my sisters n my mothers life but also love and support him fr all the things that he has done fr me. I know its very hard but its gonna get better someday it will! :) thats what I tell myself everyday. I know blaming someone will never make our situation better but sometimes I think why are we kids facing these problems when all of this was started by the adults?
Ik my answer is not that motivating but ig reading this would make u feel better coz no1 has a perfect family. So just concentrate on urself- on ur lyf,ur future n mental health coz thats what matters d most!! :)

Anonymous

Hey, thank you so much. It makes me feel little better after reading your story and I completely agree with you. I need to concentrate on myself and try to be happy. If one person is happy, it makes other family members happy too. Last week I got flowers for my sister, she loves to decorate her room with fresh flowers. “It brings positivity”, she said. And I will do every little thing to bring my family back on track. Thank you very much.