Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

I feel like no one understands or even try to, I cover all of my feelings with a smile and help everyone else I feel lonely in darkness you would think the people closest to you would see behind your fake smile but they don’t even notice it’s like I don’t matter or they don’t even care I was sexually abused by my mom’s boyfriend I didn’t tell until I was 18 I was so afraid you know the weirdest thing my grandma said that other people said he was like that and no one thought to protect me I’m filled with so much anger so much sadness. I was diagnosed as epileptic at the age of 20 and now I feel even more like no one knows how I feel. the overthinking the anxiety not a care if i live or i die the doctors don’t seem to care all they think about is you haven’t had a seizure you’re fine. I’m not fine I’m far from it I told my doctor that my job took me out of work for having too many seizures on the job I even tried to get disability benefits I was denied and they just said when I go to another job they got to make accommodations. I’m a safety hazard to everything around me I don’t even go into stores like that I mainly sit in the car or sit at home. I just can’t take it anymore.