I feel crappy. Well, It’s not all that bad as I’m quite used to this feeling. But I’m doing quite well physically… And I’m kind of being pretentious around everyone. Like I laugh, crack jokes, stay happy? While being around everyone I know and love. But I don’t feel them inside like idk. It feels kind of like dissociating myself? I’m mainly feeling a few things like guilt ( a shit load of them) guilt for eating, for drinking, for breathing, for thinking something… Guilt for not being grateful for, I got great friends and family. I know I’m loved and I know I love them too but I just feel so tired from everything, i can’t do the things I like. I can’t eat properly and it’s kinda started to show and I really don’t like that this facade is breaking. I talk to my friends and I know I can open upto them but I can’t? I feel like a burden already and making them worry about me is the last thing I want to do. Besides my other friends are going through really tough times and I’m like that therapist friend/ listener friend among the group and I do want to listen and reach out (and I’m doing it) but I don’t know how long will I be able to hold it all in? I feel really exhausted every morning. I think it might be emotional burnout or depression… But I feel like I’m too tired to even care at this point. But it’s not serious serious… Like i know i will continue to exist but I don’t like this feeling I’m feeling. And I also know this time will pass and things will get better all those things but the feeling is super unpleasant.
Damn. I sound like a damsel in distress. Which I hate again😅
It looks like someone just felt my feelings and presented it.
Anyways…I understand what you are going through and the only thing you can do is believe in yourself and trust yourself. I am here to listen to you. Let your feelings out. If you wanna talk about it let me know. Okkay. Take care
Thank you. I’m sorry that you have to go through similar things, it must be hard.
Thanks, I feel a bit better.
The same goes for you too😊
Yes you are doing great, I can tell you this that you are an awesome human being. The feeling of being guilty can be removed by indulging into some kind of work that you are passionate about. So that the empty time to think about guilt will be occupied with that passion. And you will get busy doing that. All right wonderful soul see you then
Thank you so much! I’m trying to focus on drawing and reading, I hope that distracts me for a while.