i face al lot conflict within myself to decide about about a lot of stuff.

Indécision is the curse of every millennial.
It’s ok we have a lot of choices. For anything it allows us to Make informed decisions

Would you care to elaborate as to what kind of conflict? Maybe people face similar issues?

In face of conflict, if there is a lot of anxiety, go with the practical informed choice.

Work

I’m so pissed at other people’s attitudes and how they’re so interfering, hypocritical and such gossip mongers... don’t they have their own life or what 

Other

I am not feeling anything losing interest in life. I am not beautiful i am afraid of talking people in person. On internet everyone can easily say it is ok to have acne,black skin tone but in real everyone gonna judge you.Lack of self confidence, antisocialism and many more things sucks.having a relationship in which you feel that your partner does't a person you want to spend your life but again you are stuck you just cant get over, don't have power to hurt someone say these thing to your partner. What you gonna do in such life!!!! Not a settls carrier, ur only bestfrnd suffering with major depression, and here i am doing nothing  for him.shit man what a moron am I😓😓😓😓

Depression

Sometimes you’re just exhausted by talking too much 

Life

I am tired of pretending I don't care, I don't miss you, I don't love you. Idk how to say it because I f'ed up pretty bad(mostly). Idk what is going on in your life, idk whether you are seeing someone or not. I was absurd. Please text me once, I am scared of you. I cannot but if you show some care for once I swear to tell you everything what is in my heart. I miss you.

3am Thoughts

This text is going to be very long since I am going to talk about something which lasts about 4 years and has gotten worse from time to time. I have never talked with someone about it. I'm afraid to, because the problems I have are really stupid and weird. I'm actually really sure that no one has experienced it yet or know how to cope with it but I will post this anyways.
*Tw//Suicide/Depression/Insomnia*
So, let me start from the beginning: I had to skip the 7th grade bc of my good performance in school. That was the point where everything started. I was bullied and called nerd. They made me feel like an outcast. During that time I lost a lot of friends and felt so lonely. I let my grades drop intentionally so that they would stop calling me a nerd and all that kinda stuff. I just had two friends back then. One of them moved and changed school after 2 years. And the other one decided to live with her dad in America. (I live in Europe) 
There I lost nearly everything. I had no one, everyone had left me. I got depressed, my grades dropped and I had suicidal thoughts. I didn't want to live anymore. No one would care. 
Then I became familiar with Stray Kids (a Kpop group) who helped me a lot through their music and messages. But I somehow tried to cope with it alone and started to develop really weird, let's call it 'habits'. 
My thoughts are really toxic. I can't control them and they really destroy me. Always, when I feel fear, I connect really weird things to it. That's why it is hard to get rid of this mechanism. It is difficult to describe but I always doubt the things around me as the trigger for my failure and feelings. Because of this I can't rlly concentrate on anything since 2 years. I'm afraid to not be able to concentrate and bc of this fear I really can't concentrate. It's so stupid. I begin saying that I can't do it bc of this noise, bc of this object in my field of view. It's horrific. 
I'm also a perfectionist and let disrupt me from small things. The problem is that I can't forget these stupid thoughts so it is constantly in my mind. This fear controls me. Bc of this shit I also suffer from insomnia. I guess I haven't slept longer than 6 hours for almost 2 years now. Thoughts are just really hard to control when there has been developed a -in my case bad and wrong- structure and routine. 
I think that's it for today. Maybe I will continue this story bc there are a lot more things to tell but I guess I will end it here. 
I'm so thankful for every single person who has read everything up to here and hope for a response. Thank you! 

Mental Health

Heartbroken 💔

Breakup

SCREAM ABOUT WHAT'S CURRENTLY BOTHERING YOU. (CAPS LOCK ONLY!)
GET IT OUT. DOESN'T MATTER HOW BIG OR SMALL THE COMPLAINT IS. 
GET. IT. OUT. 


Mental Wellbeing

I don’t know why, but I just started feeling extremely sad about two hours ago. I even cried a little bit. ￼

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts