I don’t want to make my parents upset but I feel like I’m disappointing them. I’ve always feard this day will come. And I’m starting to see the disappointment in them. It scares me, whenever I get the courage to do something, or to tell them something they always say something that makes me feel bad and back off. Since I was young I’ve always said only what they wanted to hear, acted like they wanted me to always doing as I’m told, I was never forced to but still for some reason I always did, I would never disagree with anything, it’s not my parents fault at least I don’t think so cuz they’ve always treated me well I just developed this fear myself. I never expressed how I truly felt at all,they have never even seen me cry, even when I was supposed to cry I still hide. Other kids fight with their parents and that’s normal, but I have never been able to do that(i have had little arguments with my parents but only about stupid stuff, like I wanted them to buy me something but they didn’t type of stuff. But not about anything I actually care about) Bc of this my parents don’t really know me and have created certain expectations of who I am. Now I dececided I wanted to start being myself by saying what I actually mean cuz only that way I can be happy, only that way I can achieve what I want. If I don’t say how I feel how could they understand. But, I haven’t even barely started and they’re already getting disappointed?, my mom came at me today saying “I don’t really like the way you’re behaving lately”. Once she left I started crying, see, I can’t do this, this is why I cant cuz I know this will happen and I don’t want to. I don’t want to disappoint them. What am I supposed to do? All my courage disappeared, there’s nothing I can do. I know I’m not who they want me to be and that is breaking me
Hey. You’re not born to satisfy your parents. It sounds harsh, but at a point in your life they’ll be gone, and then the only one who has to be satisfied with you is yourself. And it’s the same now. You aren’t owing them something because they raised you. It’s your life, not theirs.
Be who you really are. It’s really important, because if you always just play a role, you’ll never be happy, because you’re not doing the things you want to do.
If they don’t like your True Self, then maybe you need to accept it. Maybe you don’t like the way they are too, but no one needs to change to please someone
Soon enough you’ll stand on your own feet, and if your parents still don’t like your True Self, then maybe it’s time to focus on friends or other people who do.
thank you, you’re probably right. I’ll try my best to stop being like this and just act like myself but it’s hard im really scared but i know i need to do it or else i will only live with regret. I’m just really scared so i keep avoiding anything that could cause conflict with my parents. And about focusing on other people well ,i don’t have anyone else. i don’t have any firends just some people i met online, they’re the only ones who know the real me. I keep everything inside and put on an act when im arround other people, not gonna lie im getting tired. That’s why i know i need to do this,only if i am myself i can be happy. But my problem is always the same,i know what i need to do i just don’t know how, im scared and i always feel like i can’t do it. I’m just really sensitive and i don’t want to get hurt, if i am myself i know i will get hurt but after all that what’s what life is about you need to get hurt. yk the stars can’t shine without the dark something like that, you can’t be happy without pain.
idek if i’m making sense it’s 2am lol
anyways thank you for your words and your advice i really needed to hear that, now i just hope i can make use of what you just said
