the_alessia @the_alessia
I don’t know what’s going on. But lately I feel so lonely. I feel to be loved and feel some warmth. I just want to hug someone and cry my heart out. But I don’t really have anyone to do so. I just don’t know. I feel so unloved even though there are my parents who loves me unconditionally. Argh, this is so frustrating.
There’s this quote I read somewhere it goes like " Just because you love me doesn’t mean I feel loved" And it changed my mind forever. People can love us with whatever they have and it is possible that we don’t feel it to a larger extent. And maybe it’s okay, if we know that there is at least one person in this whole world who can love us with everything they have, I think it’s enough for us to survive. In your case I hope you find tranquility in whatever you have right now
hanmin @crysen
Sounds confusing. And it also sounds like you feel guilty that you feel unloved when though you are.
I wonder if it’s not an issue of being loved but actually one of being understood. Like, you know you are cared for, but what you’re looking for right now is someone who can walk with you and discuss with you your questions, dreams and thoughts, or share with you your interests. Not sure if that fits with you.
So it might not be ‘unappreciative’ but there is a missing angle of care that you feel you need.
And also ‘someone to…’ does not automatically mean a romantic partner.
the_alessia @the_alessia
You just put my messed up thoughts in to words which I could not. Thank you. You are right, I am more into the side of being found and understood. Thousands of thoughts are clouding my mind since last year. I wanted to study medical science, gave my pmt. Failed last year. I am preparing again and at times like this, you have so many thoughts and feelings which you want to share with someone. There are certain thoughts I cannot share with my parents or even my friends. I tried saying but they all gave negative replies which makes me feel more lonely and helpless.
You are also on point about “romantic partner” thing, I need a friend. Anyone but a friend who will listen to my every thoughts without any judgement.
hanmin @crysen
I feel you on this! Family and close ones can be so risky to share to sometimes. Their words can mean so much that when they don’t respond positively it cuts too deep to handle, and it feels easier to stay quiet than to share.
Retaking your PMT takes so much courage! but I’m sure it also brings a lot of fear and anxiety - not just about passing but also the whole host of what ifs in case you dont make it.
If you’re good financially, I would actually suggest to look for a therapist for a once-off session. They’re trained to listen and support and, if you’re open to it, to ask tough questions and yet stick with you to work through the answers. It can be expensive long term, but one or two sessions might be both helpful and affordable.
Alternatively… A trusted prof/teacher might be good too. Most educators are there because they care, and they often understand these struggles more than those outside the system.
I also want to feel loved by someone other than a parent
