i can’t wait to get out of this town, i hate it here. I know running away isn’t always the best way but i just find it so difficult to start over in a place where nothing’s new. Even if i want to change, i can’t, because everyone knows me already, im surrounded by the people i grew up with and they will always associate me with that past version of myself. It’s hard to prove yourself when everyone thinks to already have an idea of who you are. There’s too many expectations already set and i can’t do anything without feeling judged for it. It’s like if i try too hard everyone will notice that i’m trying, i don’t want that. On top of that every single corner of this town brings back memories, some of them are really bad and i don’t wanna remember them, it’d be better if i didn’t have to pass by those places daily, it’d be better if i didn’t have to see it anymore. I’m moving out to another country soon, that’s what’s supposed to happen if everything goes well but i really don’t wanna wait that long, even if it’s only one more year, i wish i could start over right now :/
Hey, I get it. The feeling to just leave behind everything in a moment. And just start everything new, new place new people and all its just great and you should do that. Yes it’ll be hard at first but you need that. And if you feel the need to start it right now, there’s only way to ignore these things, try not to let it affect you(I know you have tried this, but you too know that there’s not a instant solution for this) , so just go with the flow, anyways you’ll be moving out of the country soon, so just live it all here, and start a whole new life there. All the best
thank you so much for understanding <3 and yes you’re right, i need this and i’ve been needing it for years, i’ve tried starting over in the past by changing schools but nothing really changed. I still leave in a small town where everyone knows each other so most people at the other school new me already so i had to hold myself back from being anything they didn’t expect from me. Now that i’m in college i’m starting to get a chance to finally start in a new place and i’m excited for it but i’ll unfortunately have to wait a year for that to happen. I hope time goes by as fast as possible… Like you said i shouldn’t let it get to me since there’s nothing i can do just right now so i’ll try my best to enjoy my time here as much as i can even if i hate many things and just be patient for what will come next.
My mannn 🤝🏻💯
