Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

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If you or somebody you know is currently struggling, please take deep breaths and reach out to somebody. Here are few resources that may help.
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Anonymous

I can’t stop thinking negatively. My “family” views me as negative, but their the one’s that have caused me misery, and I hate to admit that I want them to suffer the same anguish they’ve brought me.

I live alone, but no friends. I try to be positive, take my meds, and go therapy, which I find repetitive and doesnt help much. My mother always told me that therapy was giving me excuses to be disrespectful and doesn’t hear out anything I try to say when I tell her how she has effected me and why I am the way I am. Im miserable, lonely, full of flaws and mentally broken because of my father’s sexual abuse and mother’s emotional neglect. Yet everyone in my family sees me as the negative one and a new one…my grandmother now says I should have told about the abusr when it happened from 8-14 and not when i was 16. I felt extremely guilty for telling and then not telling for myself cause he never went to jail and is harassing. I went to the cops and they havent done a thing to help. Im alone and feeling worthless and any time i try nothing goes right or in my favor. My mother callas me selfish i just want to die…to not even be around so noone can call me selfish for being the way i am because thats what i was made from. My dreams are alao in tatters. Im just wasting oxygen at this point.

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Profile picture for Now&Me member @kumkum
2 replies
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Anonymous

Hiii there
It’s fine to feel all that way
Children generally suffer mentally becz of wrong upbringing by parents we all suffer from childhood traumas nd that’s not the good thing in our culture
Well u can help urself by ignoring ur parents and stop expecting any emotional support from parents or friends I know it’s hard to do but trust me This will make u strong and get urself out of it it might take time but it’s time to get up and live ur life try online earning and make urself independent and just leave the place u don’t feel worth leaving Or just paint read novel try to keep urself busy with good stuff just focus on today that how can u make the day nest leave the rest don’t think about past and future . U just have to spend one day fully how can u do that just figure it out watch the motivating Vedios on YouTube . God have send u to do something really good help people try to talk to strange old people try to visit old age home and talk to people there they will love talking to u . Cook something great and feed them or just feed the street dogs u will eventually find happiness in small things u just have to stop thinking about it past ur parents what they think about u just leave let them think they r not going to change but u can chnge urself ur persepective toward things and life

Profile picture for Now&Me member @kumkum

Puh.tato @kumkum

You are so strong bro! I cannot even imagine what you must be going through but suffering from sexual abuse by your own father and then standing upto it, that needs a hell lot of courage man!
You’re not being negative you’re just suffering from things that make you react this way. Whenever there is negativity or anything bad in our life, we distance ourselves from them right? that’s what you should do. There’s so much ahead of you! Try to do things that make you happy, wake up early, try a different kind of coffee or drink, go out for real (be super safe), decorate your room, get your life together and all. When you love yourself, others love you too. Thinking about yourself and doing things for yourself is NOT being selfish okay? I’d be love to be friends with such courageous person! And I hope all you do is shine and grow!

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