I am very shy and guilty of this.But at the same time this is something I can’t control,its natural.
I am a guy and since childhood I got interest to look at defined male bodies (it started after Salman Khan’s exposure in all his movies).
I am 28 now and in my workplace I have a colleague with defined body and I love looking at him.He probably got to know my intentions and started ignoring me.He does talk to me regarding work and all but most of the times avoids eye contact with me.
This thing had happened even in my college days with other guys.I am very guilty that because of me these guys have to remain alert.
My only desire is to see them shirtless but I never crossed my line and will never do it.
In fact,whenever I noticed that the person is uncomfortable due to my vision I stopped bugging them.
I wish I was straight too.Straight guys don’t face these issues and most probably they are not hated when they show interest in women.
I wish there could be some kind of counseling which will help me stop getting attracted to good physique men.
I felt the same way until recently. I’m a woman and I was always guilty that I stared at other other girls in a way they probably would feel disgusted by. Especially in the locker rooms, when they would say things about feeling safe because we were all women. It implies that they wouldn’t be safe if someone was looking at them sexually, so I felt like I was predatory. I even tried dating a man because I felt like it would be safer if I dated someone I wasn’t sexually threatening to at all. Of course, that didn’t work out.
But I realized that even straight people do that. Girls stare at cute guys and guys stare at cute girls. We stare at the things we like. We like to look at things that make us happy. As long as it isn’t hurting anyone, there’s nothing wrong with it. If you’re not voicing how sexy you find these guys and actively hitting on them when they don’t want it, there’s no harm done. You aren’t taking advantage of them or posing a threat to them. You’re even being understanding that some people might feel uncomfortable and dislike being stared at. That’s proof enough that you’re a good person!
I’d recommend going somewhere where staring at the people you like is totally acceptable. I go to gay bars. I can stare at all the women I want, and they like the attention they get from me, because hey, that’s what they came there for! It makes me feel better about it and reminds me that I’m not doing anything wrong. Because honestly, I’m not. I just love who I love, and so do you. You just have to find the right place to feel free to express it. Good luck! I’ll be cheering for you!
Thanks both of you for answering.But can anyone tell me which place in mumbai will allow me to do so?
I’m sorry, but not sure about that. You could perhaps try tinder/bumble/any other dating apps. and there are always affordable oyo rooms around where you could go with your partner
Hey, There’s nothing wrong with your feelings of attraction. But even if a straight man stares at a woman for long, it is not right. It is rude to stare. Women also get uncomfortable because of such men. I can understand your fascination. I think you need to go out and experience and explore your sexuality with those who may be interested. That way, it won’t just be a curiosity but something you have tried for yourself. Don’t feel guilty about liking boys but if you think you are making them uncomfortable because of staring too long then do keep yourself in check about that. You don’t need any counseling because attraction is natural and nothing wrong with it. You just need to control your urge to stare. And as you have said, you have never crossed the line, so you’re good ?