I am Under Pressure,alone. Coz it's the only last chance for me to bounce back if I do it I will fullfil my family dreamz but If I loose it then I loose everything. Let's see what will happen

It basically means.. i dont feel so i dont judge if one talks a thing to me and its kinda cool  and insane like me 

I want you to know that everything will be fine. Times are hard but we'll get through this. Stay strong.


Hey anon!
Look no need to be pressurized believe in yourself, we might be strangers but i believe in you and i know you gonna hit the thing up!! Your family is gonna be so so so proud of you.. just relax and believe. 
Wanna talk more dm on @practically__dead insta


Depression

I live in a house with my parents who don't understand me and show negetive emotions to who I am all the time, I am dealing with that in therapy.
But what got through everything is my cat her u judgmental meow was music to my ears! She is only one who made me want to cheer up put food pet play. We do leave out to roam about in the balcony. 
Today she escaped and returned and has been 24hrs now. 
I am so gonna crave her meow, and is going to leave me so anxious and need for empathy with not a single person to recive it from. 
I know 24hrs is too less to loose hope, but my cat in 3 years hasn't done this ever, and we tried searching for her in a decent radius around as well, and didn't find her, so odds are really not in positive sense.
My friend had a theory which said if some one feeds her fish she may choose to stay at thier place.
And I always kept thinking of getting dish and putting for her and I never did... 
I really wish I had done things differently, 
As I type this one thing I realise is I'm going to watch Grey's anatomy, that's series has helped me deal with losses, doctors have to see the losses and move on. 
This is why Journaling helps so much. 
I really don't think I should post this, too long. But I think Im just gonna wing it, Say Jai and post it. 

Pets

Until you get comfortable with being alone, you will never know if you are choosing someone out of love or loneliness.

Confusion

Hello Everyone I am new in this app please tell me which type of app is this

Friends

I do 
I did 
Iam done 
Is it only me ? If so why me ?

3am Thoughts

I got placed today after soooo many rejections. It's an average package but It's good that i got a development role. But I'm not feeling anything. Empty inside 😶

Emotional Abuse

Anything you want to say to all the boys and uncles who just stares at you randomly and makes you feel super uncomfortable 😟

Being a type of person who doesn't have anyone to open up to at home about everything thats going on inside your mind can drive you insane. Im the youngest one in the family and all my damily members are the older siblings of their siblings so as you can see no one can understand my struggle of being the youngest. I grew up being invalidated and being the one who is watched like a hawk so opening up or making mistakes was a big deal and because of this I had no choice but to keep a personality. Apparently the voice of the youngest person in the house has no effect whatsoever..... it never mattered what I thought or felt or if I wanted this or that or if I was happy or sad because im suppose to be okay. 

In the course of my whole 17 years, I developed an eating disorder. It wasn't about being skinny and they all thought it was when in reality that was my form of self-harm. Not eating, sleeping and overloading myself with work. The feeling that im slowly killing myself was making me feel like I could escape all the expectations everyone had for me.

When I started entering my teenage years, I got some attention from guys every now and then and since it was the attention that I never felt before not even from my family.... I strived for it. I know how sad it sounds but it was the best thing I ever got. Finally, someone appreciating me. 

Im slowly going insane as no one really knows what runs in my head for all the trauma and pain they caused me.

Anxiety

Yesterday in meeting when my manager asked do u know this? I said yes even though I don't know and said wrong ans as Google and other person ans. I'm feeling so shameful and embarrassed from yesterday onwards. Is admitting my mistake to my manager and telling him even though I don't know I will learn will make good impact for me?
I told lie bcz I thought If I told I don't know they will consider me as useless. At that time I'm nervous and I didn't think twice before telling lie but I'm not that type of person to tell lies. If any mistake happened by me I admit it. bcz of yesterday thing I'm feeling bad like I did something wrong.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts