I am so ashamed of myself.

My brothers friend helps us with the kitchen, and he makes fun of me sometimes rude but !!! I wanted to make a light joke and I said stinky working man. And I think it was very very rude but it slipped through my mouth.

And I feel so embarrassed and bad and guilty.
Should I and how to apologize next day ? 
Just sorry I wasn’t serious 

❤️ You can’t imagine how thankful I am for your comment . I hope I can apologize and he don’t feel bad like me.

I am sure that person didn't, it's okay buddy, you are just overthinking. And you so sweet amd kind of thinking another person. 
Take care :)

It's okay. I hope that person didn't mind. Next time you meet, find the casual moment when they are good, and say like hey, sorry you said that, that day, but you didn't mean to that way. Just a joke

Anxiety

She hides her feelings, her pain and tears with a smile. She doesn't want to burden anyone with her troubles. She wants to be strong, to be brave, to be happy. But behind that smile, she is breaking. She is longing for someone to see through her mask, to hold her hand, to comfort her soul. She is waiting for someone to say..
"You don't have to smile if you don't want to. I'm here for you."

3am Thoughts

Day 121 of writing journal entries.

I was little more tired today than I usually am, but it wasn’t a bad day! It was kind of a lazy day, most of my days are lazy days- but it was a lazier day today. 😂

I have youth group tomorrow, which I’m excited for since I didn’t get to go last week. 

I’ve also noticed that my mood is usually the same, it’s what I call a “fragile contentment,” meaning I feel okay but if someone did something to upset me, even if it was small, it would probably ruin my mood. Same thing the other way around though, one small compliment, could make my whole day, and make me feel unstoppable. Most of the time though I’m in a neutral state of “fragile contentment” because I don’t spend much time around people, and the people I do spend time with (my family) like to make my life miserable… so yeah… but today was good day, so it’s alright.

Personal Growth

Life is a music
Sometimes treble
Sometimes silent
& Sometimes high bass.......

Good night.... Going to sleep with this broken heart❤️‍🩹 

Celebration

Mornin y'all ✨🥂 , A thought for u💫
Sometimes you have to let go of the life you have planned for so that you can embrace the life that is waiting for you out there with all your heart. Letting go is hard but when you hold onto what you are supposed to let go your life more difficult, it takes of, it you away from all that you are worthy of. But every day you have a choice, to choose only what matters to your heart, to not give up trying when things are hard and to be hopeful and prepared for a better future. Let today be the beginning of that.💜

Affirmations

i remember those days when I used to go to therapy and my therapist asked me questions like, did your parents abuse you? why do you lie to your mother? is she aggressive?. And I could not answer those questions just because my mother before every session she used to say not to give details about what happens at home because they would call to social services and after that, I would be surrounded by drug addicts and I will not have a future after then. The fear of being in the worst place made me be silent for years. When the worst place was my own 'home', where I was all the time paying attention to every detail so my mother will not shout at me. Committing an error was not an option, that is why you grow up before time because you cannot complain, all you gotta do is obey and do not give your opinion, as it was not important. The funniest thing is that people find a nice and quiet girl, I wasn't, I was afraid of my own mother. Being 11 years old I was spending most of the time at home because my mother was working and I was not allowed to go out to see my friends. Basically, I spent 8 years of my life at home, socialising just at school. My dream was to have an activity to do after school (dance, draw, music..) Never had that privilege, but that is not the point of the story.
The whole point is when you grow up, and you find yourself internally mature but externally every sees you as a kid. This kind of thing only leads to a toxic relationship because we think that what your parents did to you is the right thing and if your boyfriend shouts at you or hits you think that he is protecting you, but no. Who cares about you helps you to heal your wounds of the past, and progress to the future by your side. Respect is crucial in any kind of relationship. Violence is not love, love does not hurt. I hit you because I love you and I care about you is bullshit. Who loves you does not want to see you suffering. Just imagine hitting a dog, how would you feel seeing the dog suffering?
Usually, violent people have a very tough past, being abused by their parents, or living in a culture where violence is normalised. In my case my mother is Muslim and punishment = to teach. At school, if you commit a mistake they hit you with a wood stick on your hands or your feet. And it is not the way to show kids that they have done something wrong. WE LEARN FROM COMMITTING MISTAKES, NO BY AVOIDING THEM




Domestic Abuse

I am a girl
I am attracted towards females emotionly , and towards males sexually
IDK what type of gender is this

LGBTQ

Missing her so much but can't even message her 😭

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts