i am new here. it’s so dufficult to tell in other persons for my feelings but i need to speak with someone. i think i have destroy my life and the bad is that was happened for something idiot.
Hello, you can discuss here what went wrong… happy to hear and help
thank you. then the last 4 years in my life is awful. i was every day so anxious. its’s a long story. i was child and i didnt think that i will hurt myself and other peoples. i known someone from when i was kid. after years i try to speak with him after one years we had relationship. three years and it was perfect. he was so good with me but we were from distance for 2 years because he study in other land. after he must to go military. this years it was so difficult for me because i ought to read for my exams to go in a university. and the same year my parents break up. i decided to break up because i couldnt be with someone who was far away. but we were talking all the time. then he want to be with me again and me too. but when we break up after some months i decided to try with someone else. me new relationship in the beggining was very good. but i hurt him and he got cold. i didnt pass the exams and i must stay in my country and my boy go in one island. i decides to dont do the same falsh to break up for the distance. my exboyfriend he told me that he will suicide and i was so sad becuse i couldnt do anything. only to stay there for him to talk with him, i try to do him feel better. but because i was there for him i hadnt get over it. after 1 year i go there to stay with my boyfriend. we continued our relationship but the last one years i think that he doent want me like a girlfriend. now i think he didnt break up with me because he dont want to lose me from his life as human. i am with him we are almost 4 years together. we have difficult times and beautiful. i was fall in love with him and know if i am now. but i love him. i think that i cant stay other with him but i cant break up. i dont know why but it’s like more strong than me. all these years every time when i was sad i stopped eating. my exboyfriend he has waiting 3 years. i have stay with him like friend. i have for him some feeilings and he has for me. but now he find one girl. yes i know you will tell me that he had waiting to much and now he must fix his life. now i dont know maybe i understand that i dont want to lose him. but i am so confused because i dont want to lose persons from my life and i cant stay away from them. but i am not sure if i dont want to lose him or i want to be with him. if it was only this it will be more easy but no the last summer i met someone. he told me about his feeiling and we speak i didnt do something with him but he is perfect and he waiting me to break up. all this is a circle. the last 4 years. it’s this. i dont want to play with anyone but every time i dont know what i want and must to do. three persons. i know that you will not have a good image for me. but i am not a bad person. only confused. i passed so much all this years. but i know that i hurt other person. i know that i have do so much bad things. i am here because i dont want to hurt other myself and others. i dont know what i must to do i cant continue my life like all this years.but i cant stand out.
First of all, I am not thinking bad about you at all. I don’t think you are a bad person at all. We all get confused in life and your intention is not bad. You don’t want to hurt anyone and I get that.
Firstly, I would say that you don’t NEED anybody. The fact that you don’t want to lose him is just coming out of a ‘habit’ that you have for him. And it will take time but you will get over that habit. You will get over him. If it’s not healthy for you, you need to move on.
But once you do move on, don’t suddenly go to someone else. Don’t escape from your feelings with someone else. Give yourself time to just be with yourself and enjoy your time being alone. Let yourself heal and be alone and figure out what you actually want in life!
Thank you for the advise. you are right, i must stay alone with myself. Because i think that i have lose me. i care so much for the feelings for others who i didn’t look myself anymore. i will try move on.
Yes please! Give time to love and find yourself. All the best and take care. Talk here again if you feel like, I’ll be here :)