i am missing someone but idk whom like weird kindof loneliness idk

3am Thoughts

which one black roses or white roses

I used to have the most amazing friendship with this girl. all i wanted to do was spend time with her. now i barely talk to her, she doesnt greet me when i get to school anymore, she only ever talks to me and wants to be with me when there is no one else. idk wether i should let her go or try to build up our friendship again. pls give me advice

Friends

Sometimes I just wanted to feel the feeling of being loved
Being loved crazily where I'm his first priority ofcourse not before work or family but a priority where he knows he has to be with me for sometime or or sometimes because I need him
Being clingy to me, irritate me,make fun of me, knows every small details about me.
Being loved where he can say proudly that I'm his instead of introducing me as just another friend.
The feeling of being loved where silence also works as melody for us.
Where being with each other feels like home.
💜💜
Where Instead of lust his eyes will only show love.
The feeling of being loved where he is ready to accept my flaws despite making me feel guilty about it.
Does this feeling of being loved exis?
Does the thing called pure love still exists?
Yesss
 the thing called pure love still exist not in the dream but in this world but its just everyone wants to be loved instead of giving the same amount of love they just want to be loved or maybe the clouds of lust covers the feeling of love.

Love

What you'll call this person in your life 
One you misses but also don't wanna be with rn, their voice gives you relief and there's not a word of relation you can give to them¡

So its not such a big problem rn
But my gf broke up with me about a hour and a half ago we have been together for almost a month and she said that she feels like i love her a lot more than she loves me which in her look feels not fair she also says that things moved pretty quick..

I am just waiting to talk with her rn cuz im pretty comfortable we can fix it i just cant really do anything else than think about it cuz then when i try to do other things i start to think about it and it makes me feel bad

Breakup

Why is it so hard to accept that your favorite person have their favorite persons too and that's okay....my closest friend cares about me soo much...and I can feel it in my bones...she loves me...listens to me...we have literally the cutest bond I've ever had in my life...and I love her way too much...Idk why I feel insecure...I can't be the only person she has right...people have other people too...but I just can't stop thinking about what if's?I never had this kinda friendship with anyone so I just feel scared to lose her...I wonder what if she finds someone new...and we stop talking...
This is actually sickening and I can't stop thinking about it...
Because in life everyone just left me hanging...ghosted me. But she is the only person that stayed...i never thought I'd be this vulnerable for a person..😣


I need people to understand this
A LOT OF DEPRESSED PEOPLE DON'T ACT DEPRESSED. 

Depression

Just a heads up about my condition. It keeps getting worse. I don’t know how long I can hold it in now. The storm that’s taking place inside of me is a brutal one and I don’t know how to get out of the clutches of this storm. It somehow feels like my heart is bleeding even though it isn’t, I know. Probably the worst I’ve felt till now. I just want to escape from here. I want to escape this reality of mine where I’m being tormented so much. I don’t want to live in a world like this where I feel this way. It somehow feels like it’s better to die at this point. I just can’t. I’m just so messed up right now even to say a word. I know that I’m broken inside. But no one here would understand me even one bit. I thought that I could take help from my roommates, but lately one of my roommates is turning out to be more of an asshole to me and yesterday I even yelled a bit at him. I know I shouldn’t have done that, but I thought these were people that I needed to trust the most, after all I’m living with them. But I can’t. I just can’t. I can’t handle anything that’s going on in my life. I don’t even have the mind to study now. By each passing day I’m cursing myself and my fate to end up in this profession. I don’t understand it a bit. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do or what I’m going to do. I don’t know where my life is going. I don’t have my life in my grips now. I don’t know whom I should cry out for help because honestly I just don’t know who would help me with these feelings. I’ve always made the worst decisions. I’m realizing that whilst I write. I just hate myself for being here. I don’t know how I am going to spend 6 more days here without having any more suicidal thoughts. Yes, you heard it right. This place makes me want to die. The want to die is tempting here. I just don’t know. I guess I haven’t told you but yeah I won’t go out in lame way. If I do go ahead and do it, it would always be jumping off a building. At least it would be over in a flash. Without any suffering, I’ll be gone. I just don’t know who or what I am anymore. Take this as a cry out for help, if you may. But I don’t know what this really is. I just wanted to let you know that I’m feeling all these emotions and am clueless where I should go with these emotions. The next 6 days are going to be difficult for me to survive. And this is by far the most I’ve been tempted to end this shitshow of a life once and for all. I just don’t know how to deal with things. I’m a clueless being. I don’t have anything good about me. I’m just a fucking loser and always will be. I could never make my parents feel proud of me. I could never express how much someone meant to me at the right time. I couldn’t achieve what I wanted to. And most of all, I somehow manage to always hurt people in some way or the other. A person like me doesn’t deserve a place here on this planet. I should have been long gone. I don’t know what to do. I just try to be a good person but always end up being the bad one. I have this rage inside of me that could explode any minute if I don’t take care of it. But on the other hand it feels like the day I made some choices, my reason to live was long gone. I just don’t have the guts to face another failure or setback. I’ve lost all hope that I had. I lost all the positiveness I had inside of me. The person that I am is just a hollow shell of a person who has constant sad thoughts and wants to just die. I don’t know what my purpose is anymore. Earlier I had it clear in my mind what I had to do, but now I don’t. Why can’t I catch a break? Why? Just why? Don’t I deserve happiness ever? What wrong did I do to be born in this place? Why does everyone expect so much of me? I’m a human. Why am I not treated like that? WHY??

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts