I am angry because nothing goes my way, I can't have anything I want, I am starting to lose desire to hang out with anyone, I don't feel like a real person, I could easily be nothing , since I don't have anything

I just posted a huge post. I wasnt up to nor I had an answer yesterfay . I guess here it is 

Anger Issues

Hey
Back here after a long time
Not sure how it feels
Hope you all doing good

Other

Love isn't like it is in the books!

Delusion

Hi
New day, new life, new hope, new experience.

I am am optimist, in search of like-minded people here. Anyone available here?

Coming Out

Literally stressing over my grades bc it will come out this Monday and I feel like I didn't do well this quarter :(( My parents would not be happy if I get a low grade :((

School

sharm, dehshat, jhijhak, pareshaani
sab’r se kaam kyu nahii letii..... 
aap, jii, voh, magar, yeh sab kya hai, 
tum meraa naam kyu nahii letii... 

Poetry

After him jisse bhi baat karne ki koshish krti hu nahi kar pati because uski baate yaad aa jati hai aur uske alawa kisi aur se baat karne ka dil bhi toh nahi karta.......

Love

Idk how much she likes me,,

She has called me talented when I showed her my art, she said she might consider reading the book series I told her I like and added a smiley when she did(this is all over text bc she's in a diff country), and she complimented a picture I took of a nice view.

This is friendly, right? Smileys do not have to mean romantic intrest, right?

Idk what I would do if she romantically liked me tbh

I am very happy she seems to like the things I share, though. And she makes me happy whenever I think of her. 

Confusion

I'm kinda pissed off because for some reason, no one at my middle school likes me. All because last year I was a little annoying. So this year I go quiet and stick to myself and still nobody wants to be around me. Not only that, but my Dad recently stopped smoking. Now you're probably thinking "Good for him!" but no. Ever since he stopped he's been getting really pissed off over stupid crap. Like one time I was climbing down from my loft bed and fell off the ladder. Instead of asking if I'm okay he goes, "What the hell, you're gonna scratch the floor or put a dent in it or something. " Like he can talk. Like, 2 months before, he kicked a hole in our hallway closet door. Then he yells at me for FALLING off my ladder. Not only that but my parents don't get off work until 5:00. They don't get home until 5:30 pm. And I'm not allowed to go outside unless they are home. So on school days I'm inside all day from 7:30 am to 3:10 at school, then I get home, and I'm stuck inside from 3:30 to 5:30 by myself. Lastly, every time I ask a girl out she rejects me.

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