I am 25 year old girl…I have dated my bestfriend for an year in 2018 aug to mar 2019…in 2019 when we moved to another city…he started acting weird…he broke my heart by saying I ain’t good enough,not caring enough,not feminine enough…he said he’s getting attracted to another girl say ‘Harry’…I was devasted…he came back to me and apologized & said he just got carried away by Harry & was never in love with her…I’ve always been his priority and we had a bumpy relationship during 2019…it was toxic…it was on his terms…I left myslf…I left my self-respect…and went to him each & every single time he needed me…! What can I do…? I loved him so so much by then…I loved him more than I loved myself…I put his happiness above mine…I had low self esteem issues then…I felt like trash…I felt worthless…
He treated me like shit though…
I failed all of my exams due to this mental agony…
Later I realised he was a toxic person and broke up with him at the end of 2019…but in March 2020 he came back saying he missed me…I believed him…I wanted to get back with him…but that girl HARRY messaged me saying that they have been in a relationship since 2018 jan…which means they’ve been in a rltnshp before me & him started dating…I have known that guy for 6 years…we have been bestest friends in our college for 6 long years…we worked together during internship too…I have never known he was in a rltnshp then…nobody did…I trusted him…& Loved him…I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him…I wanted to be his…while I wanted him to be mine…but what all he did was that…he lusted upon his bestfriend & got her into bed with him…while already being in a rltnshp with another girl(Harry) I am just broken…my whole life seems like a lie now…it’s been
almost one year & I still haven’t gotten over that…! He was my bestfriend…how could he possibly do that to me? How could he play with my emotions…? How could he use me like a sex toy while I was genuinely loving him…? Is all the kindness in this world dead ?? I am crying every single night…I have ruined my career…I don’t know what to do in life anymore…I gave my all but still wasn’t good enough…
I loved him honestly & truly but in the end what all I got is betrayal…! Help me how to get out of this pain…I am crying every single day…literally every single day…when I am among friends I am fine…but when I am alone…I can’t stop myself from thinking about what happened to me…my career’s at stake & I have a competitive exam coming up within 1½ month but I haven’t even prepared for that…Its almost impossible to crack it now…😢😭 How do I get out of this…? Kindly help…!
Sometimes we do things that makes us feel okay, momentarily. Don’t be hard on yourself. Try to move on, peacefully and positively.
Being best friends with someone and falling in love with them is two different things.
Firstly, If he was really your best friend then he would always put his priorities over yours and balance out the relationship.
You are loveable, beautiful and smart and you should be proud of yourself to be able to get through this toxic phase in your life.
Know that it will only get better after this. Whatever you’re feeling now is temporary.
You education and whatever is it that you like to do is yours. Its you personality, it is what makes you you. If you ruin that for people who make you doubt yourself. Then stop. Its good that you’ve realised.
One step a day, slowly try and get him out of your life and focus on greater and better things.
More power to you!💗
Thanq for such kind words :)
For right now, you should just focus on yourself! I know it may not be easy moving on from this since he was your best friend and you trusted him, but if he doesn’t see how much care you gave him and would rather spend all his time and energy on lust for another woman, then he isn’t worth it. He may have cared before but it seems like he doesn’t anymore. And I’m so sorry.
But you said you have an exam coming up soon, so you should focus purely on studying for it! Make sure you work hard enough to do well on it. And if they message you again, I personally think it would be best to ignore them until you get your life back together. Remember that YOU are the most important thing in your life, and that you don’t owe anything to anyone, no matter how many times they say you do.
And maybe once you get your career back in shape, you can work on finding a guy that cares about what you are into and your career and respect your life decisions.
I hope things work out for you. ❤
Thanq for such kind words :)
Sanket @sanket
If that guy has cheated on you and also you got confirmation from harry then don’t you think you should have steered away already? Stop thinking about him, this will just ruin your own life.
Yes indeed I should stop ruining myself & strt preparing for the upcoming exam…thanq for such kind words
