Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

How can i move on from a complicated relationship but not exactly a bf/gf relationship but me and the girl been doing everything together also sleep/cuddle together. I can’t stop thinking/question myself that why i got blamed saying that “we are not compatible and we both toxic” I swear that I didn’t do nth at all to be blamed and included for it like that. All I want is peace/happy/healthy committed relationship with her. I swear to God that I never start a topic that would make her mad or feel uncomfortable. She would bring up how she had to meet her ex since he misses their dog and she’s unsure if she’ll sleep with him or not if they meet, how she went to clubbing and don’t remember number of guys she kissed and got free drinks and she almost slept with a guys but she felt guilty of thinking about me, how she got invited to house party upcoming week and don’t know if she’ll be sleeping with a guy or not but she just wants freedom. I understand she wants freedom but why with me than though we aren’t in a relationship.