Heya, I need some advice on how to settle my nerves. So thereās this girl who weāll call Mal. Iāve known her for about a year and a half, but around October 2020, I fell for her. Hard. Iāve dated other people before hand, but I never asked them out, as I didnāt really feel like I connected with them, but I didnāt want to hurt their feelings. Well, Mal and I talked every day from October through February, and 2 days after Valentines day, I couldnāt stand it anymore, and I decided to ask her out. I asked her friend what movie she might want to go see, but she told me that she got with a guy on Valentines day. I felt my core shatter into pieces when I heard that. I wasnāt mad at Mal, or anyone, except myself. Mal started to call me less and less, and we just stopped talking for a bit. I still was infatuated with her. Fast forward to March, I ask Mal how she and her BF were doing, and it turns out, the guy was joking when he asked her out, so they never actually together. Mal and I started talking again, and about 3 days ago, I was ready to ask her out to go to a swimming pool. Well, as I was walking up to her, I saw her hug a guy, and I was suspicious. I waited until Mal was gone, and asked the guy if heās with her, and he said yeah. Again, I felt horrible. I missed my shot again. Now present day, I feel like Iām the reason why I canāt ask her out. She said she likes me, a lot, but she keeps getting in relationships. Am I doing something wrong? I text her everyday after I get home, to check up on her. We joke around, make dark and dirty jokes, and have a good time. I donāt get it though. I need some advice. I canāt get over her. Sheās the first woman Iāve ever actually liked. Should I until she breaks up with this guy and then ask her out? I donāt know. Any tips would be extremely appreciated. Thank you.
Mina @nepenthe
Hi there.
I so sorry that you havenāt been able to ask her out again. However as a stranger I want to give my point of view. It is as if she is waiting for you to ask her out. Since you havenāt asked her out yet, she might think that you are not interested and therefore decided to get over you by dating someone else. If you are comfortable with it, try to open up about your feeling towards her. But I would recommend not making any moves since she is seeing someone else right now. If she likes you, she wonāt have problem choosing you. However this is my opinion, so if your heart tells you to deal with this issue in another way, listen to it. But remember, as they say, a great relationship has a great communication.
I wish you lots if luck with this relationshipš
bhai uska breakup karwa de aur fir kandha de denaš¤
Well, there are a couple of options. Morally good option is to wait then ask her out, not nice option of pursuing her anyway. You could simply tell her how you feel, let it out, no pressure for anything, just speaking your truth. Iām not sure if this is a good idea or a bad idea, but you could always turn your phone off for a day, and if she doesnāt text you, youāll likely know how she feels.
These are all ideas. The best idea is to do what you feel is best, work with your soul, not against it. Do what your gut tells you. I donāt know either of you, but I do know nothing will happen if you donāt make something happen. Youāll never know how she feels until you say how you feel, and vice versa. I think itād be good to tell her how you feel. Good luck! I hope things work out