Hey, joined this platform today. Hoping some light on my issues!
I am in a dump. I had a terrible break up. It has been 2 yrs, almost. Everything still feels ugly. I have turned into this unhappy person who is cluless about her own future. Always crying and cribbing. Family and friends have been a great support but this gripping feeling of nothing-will-change remains constant.
I have career plans but I am not working hard enough for them, instead I am not working at all. Left my job 4 months ago. What really bugs me the most is why am I still stuck on the past. I know I must let go but it is not happening.
All this stress has affected my health. I have developed several illness and I want to work on it but I am unable to! Always demotivated, stressed, sad, cribbing, zero self confidence, constantly dwelling over the past! How do you stop thinking about the trauma your loved one has caused you?
I turn 30 early next year and this expectation of getting married is weighing me down. I am scared for the future all the more because I want a career, love and peace but I just don’t see it happening.
Eveytime I feel I am moving on, something or the other brings me down. Just last week I heard he got engaged. I spent the entire week obsessing over different scenarios of me accidentay meeting him. This is so stupid. Society dictates that a woman of my age must act mature, bring myself together and move on.
I REALLY want to do that. Feel normal again but it is not happening. I feel like shit. Used. Betrayed. Treated badly. Disrespected. Afraid that this will happen again.
I’ll stop here. Message got too long!
Thanks for reading.
You don’t have to act mature if you don’t want to. Don’t pressure yourself or push yourself too hard. You need to take a break for yourself. This break will help you find happiness. If you keep pushing yourself to reach the top in this state you won’t even make it the half way. I know you feel that you need to be settled by now and need to be back on your feet but that’s not true. Right now you are at your low. Stay there and heal. Get his thoughts out of your mind by focusing on yourself. It will be hard but not impossible. Cause he hurt you and now he is enjoying without any care. Then why are you hurting yourself? You know it takes a long time to find happiness. Right now instead of trying to push your limits take baby steps. Make a list and focus on one thing at a time. Just know you are at the rock bottom nothing can get any worse that means you have nothing to lose. Try everything step by step and things that make you happy keep them. Keep exploring and I hope you find your journey soon.
I like the baby steps approach. I am just overwhelmed about things around. Turning 30, no love life, no career, friends not checking on me, I mean I should be concerned about my growth. I should work hard.
I will try again tomorrow.
Thanks for talking. Hope you achieve everything you wish for :)
Yes you should be concerned about all those things once you are back on your feet. For now don’t stress yourself with all those things. It’s okay to take a break even if you are 30. Now and me family is there for you. If you ever need to talk you can come here and do that. Better than face to face talking as less judgment here.
Thanks for being there😇
Hey, I am not aiming for a start up.
My career plans include getting my Masters done from abroad.