Thought

Profile picture for Now&Me member @xxlaser
@xxlaser

Hello everyone,

Now over 10 years ago I met my best friend online and two months ago he moved to another country and he has trouble getting a place. So he cant really game anymore, also we are both workaholics and that makes it even harder to stay in touch. A few weeks ago I started to feel very depressed event at work, normally at work im fully concentrated but currently I’m working on a machine where I do nothing most of the time so I start overthinking things something I didn’t do for over 5 years now. Also playing games is no longer fun as it used to be normally on my days off and I have the time a 10 hour gaming session was normal and I enjoyed every second now I have trouble even choosing a game or even concentrating on it.

After I told my friend about it he said I should look for people to play with. Easy said for him he attracts people without even trying we once started a new game and I was away for two hours and all of the sudden he already had 3 other guys to play with. I always ask him how he does it but he doesn’t know himself.

I know a lot of people meet online these days but it all seems so temporary. An school friend of mine also meets new people all the time but he plays with them a week and then they never talk again. For me that seems like a waist of time. I also have a bit of fear of getting left behind. I had this “girlfriend” once I also met her online but I was to stupid to see she was only in it for the attention it took me a long time to get over her she had a new idiot in the net just a week later. I’m okay with being alone but of course most of you probably understand that I want some who cares about me and some I can care about. It makes life more meaningful.

I have even a hard time to answer when someone ask in a game if someone speaks german, I always keep talking english. I don’t have a hard time to talk to new people in person but that’s probably because I can’t avoid it as easily. I’m also more adventures in real life then in games, in games I like to relax and in real life I joined the army as my first job where I worked in CBRN Defence and even worked with live chemical agents and I couldn’t imagine something more interesting. Also went for my first time to a bar with my buddies from the army and had we had a great time overall. But none of them are gamers.

Maybe someone of you has an answer why have so much trouble talking to people online. I feel really weird having this restriction. It almost feels like I shifted all the problems I had in real life to my online life.

Thanks for reading and excuse my terrible english

Profile picture for Now&Me member @drishtigupta
1 reply
Profile picture for Now&Me member @drishtigupta

Drishti Gupta @drishtigupt...

Hey @xxlaser, so as I was ready your post I never for once thought that you don’t know how to talk or how to translate your thoughts into words. I think you have really explained yourself well. Which is why I feel hat you have just restricted yourself and made a ‘mental block’ that you can’t talk to people online.

Firstly I’d like to say that no one should be dependent on just 1 person in life. Like you said you are almost dependent on that one best friend of yours who moved. We should always have different people if our lives for different reasons.

For example, maybe you have 1 friend for gaming, 1 friend for talking about your life, 1 friend to go out enjoying with, 1 person to maybe workout with. Every person in our life has a different role. So maybe if you are playing with people online, maybe they can just be your gaming buddies.

As far as having someone who cares about you, I think that comes with time. The bond develops over time so you’ll have to talk to a lot of people, make a lot of friendships and then you’ll maybe find someone you click with.

On another note, I am here to listen to you! We are all here so feel free to share with us at any time you feel you need to get something off your chest :) Take care!

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