God grant me: 
The SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change,
The COURAGE to change the things I can; and
THE WISDOM to know the difference.

-Dr Rheinhold Neibur

Breakup

I just went on holiday, I tried to enjoy myself but it was too hard. No matter what I do I still feel that overwhelming feeling of emptiness.
My family is driving me crazy. My mum and dad are fighting and my brother is in a mood.
Can someone please tell me why I constantly feel guilty.
Idk I’m just typing all the thoughts in my head.
What’s the point in life

Suicidal Ideation

What's your greatest strength and your greatest weakness!?


Caregiver

I wish there was an easier way

Depression

Im rarely at peace with my body. I keep looking at myself , touching parts i would like to change , fat I would like to get rid off, fat I would like to have. It gets exhausting , all this over-thinking just leaves me tires.

Mental Health

I dont feel so good anymore. I find this constant gloom of sadness over my head. I don’t feel like going out or talking to many people . I feel so lonely most of the time. I have started to loose interest in all my friends . I want someone to just to be there for me and at the same time I am avoiding most of the people I know. 

Lonely

Well depressed for two weeks now I haven’t talk to nobody I stay to myself I’m in close closet where it’s dark I don’t know what to do because I’m always stuck in the house lonely nobody to talk too no friends I hate feeling like I’m love I been Single for 4 years now ugh  I’m always going to be heartbroken I will never get happy for nobody 

Making friends was never easy for me, and I guess I know why. I just wish society would stop labelling people as "right friends" or "fake friends". We know when people are right for us or not, including even the fake ones. A label is not necessary, but rather useless. As well as for genuine people. I do not need a label to guide me for trying to figure out the way that other people act towards me, I'll be fine figuring it on my own, no matter how long that would take.

3am Thoughts

it seems like there’s a lot to unpack here, and i think screaming into the void (?) sounds like a great way to start lmao.

march 2019 i gave my boards, i think like all pcm students, or hell, a lot of 12th graders this implies peak stress levels, peak pressure & continuous crying. i am the sort of person who bases a lot of her self worth on the amount of marks she gets, or how well she does in an internship, so this was pretty basic hell for me.

so naturally, there was a lot of second guessing, a lot of pressure i inflicted on myself, a lot of terrible pain i put myself through. all this along with a lot of pain that someone else put me through as well, only because he couldn’t make up his own damn mind. i genuinely believe i reached rock bottom in a lot of ways  during 12th grade, and march, every year, is a whole lot of anxiety for me simply because the weather is similar to that in march 2019 & subsequent months. 

i think a lot of the trauma i faced then i didn’t actually unpack till the boards were over, and at present i cannot begin to express just how terrible it was, but yeah, fuck it. everyone around me broke my heart & i was left to pick up the pieces in the middle of what seemed like the most important exams in my life, and words cannot express just how alone i felt after boards were over & i was left to unpack all of this.

but the story doesn’t even end there.

march & april 2021, the time wherein everything went to shit, and possibly a real rock bottom to me. something that i cannot unpack right now, no matter how much i try.

i think your brain tends to forget a lot of the traumatic shit that happened to it, so naturally there is a lot i don’t seem to remember, or seem to want to remember. but there is way too much i do remember, and i cannot shake the feeling that something bad is out there.

anyway yeah, these are gonna be a weird couple months, and even right now i’m positively so scared of the future, i am trying to think of all the good things in my life to feel better, but somehow my brain can only think about how they can all be taken away from me.

what even is this? 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts