Girlfriend bnane ke baad pta chala 
Sala 100rps se upar ki bhi chocolate ati he 🤔

ABD Rauf

Boyfriend

Main apna kaam acche se toh uss Varun jisne mujhe damki di thi ussne mujhe call Kiya tha kuch dar pehle ....    
Hume bola ki " hume aapse baat nahi karni hai " kuch baatana tha " 
But jab hume yeh bola ki " Or yeh kyu bola tha Ki ager tum x boyfriend ke depression se Nahi nikalli toh usse 3 din sex karunga Aur Aisa karunga Jisse tum kabhi nahi bhool paayenge 
He said " Tumne glt suna tha aur tumhare kaan baj rahe hai  aur tum bhut acchi ladki ho" 
Mere se juth bol rehe hain 
Aub voh varun mujhe puch reha hai ki "voice sex kese karte hai " Hume bol diya hai ki " hum kaam kar rahe hain"  
he said " Voh bola kab tak free hogi
Humne bol Diya "jab hum puri tarah se Free hoge tab " 
Voh bola "main wait karunga " 
Aubhi message Kiya mujhe ki " ok waiting " 
Hume bol diya ki sone ja rahe hain
He said " Me pgl hu jo wait kr rha hu "
 "Ab baat Mt Krna please"
"Jab apko jarurat thi me th na" 
Toh aubhi mujhe call Kiya tha
he said "main tumhara wait kar Raha hu " 
hume kai baar bola ki  "hum sone ja rahe hain"  
unhone bola "main kuch de raha hoon dekho " 
Toh issne mujhe 2 sex video di ,
or bola " call cut mat karna aaj puri raat tumhare saath call par rhunga " 
Humne call cut kar diya 
Aub bola "sorry "
Matlab sach me had hai main pereshan hogyi hoon inn logo se matlab ek taraf bol rehe ho sex karunga or usske baad tum bol rehe ho "sorry" ya "mene Aisa kuchh bhi ni bola hai . "


Anxiety

We were in a store buying clothes i saw a jeans which was raw stitched at the bottom.. So my mom said that 'main apne bete ko na pehenne du aise kapde tum to ladki ho... Sochna bhi mat ye lene ka' but the thing is i never wanted to buy that neither did i like it but sehow she assumed it and her words just piss me off

Discrimination

I am frustrated soo sooo much frustrated I can't explain. I want to cry there is something on my chest. I don't know what to do i really do not need any advice or anything I just want to share my feeling that's it. Esa lag rha hae jese kahi bhag jau ek ese samay me jaha me bahut khush thi. Jaha mere pass sab kuch tha. Acchi life accha din ek lovable bf cheerful friend circle and now esa lag rha hae kuch bhi nhi hae. Samay badal gya ekdam se. Kuch bhi exciting bacha nhi ab or jo hae vo itna temporary hae k dil bhr k khush bhi nhi ho skte jiske liye. Friends hae pr agle hi pal ignore karne lagte hae. Din hae pr kuch productive nhi hae. Life hae pr esa lagta hae jese khali ho chuki hae. Pata nhi vo din kaha gye jab roz raat me God ko thank you bolti thi itni perfect life dene k liye jab wish mangte samay kuch man me aata hi nhi tha bs yhi mangti thi mere pass jo hae use khush rakhna.... Or ab kuch bacha hi nhi. Ek insan k jane se esa lag rha hae jese mera poora samay hi badal gya. Man ki khushi gayab ho gai hae. Jab bhi kisi se baat karne ka man hota hae to pehla khayal usi ka aata hae aaj bhi lekin nhi kar skti bilkul nhi. Kab aayege vo din vapas jab me firse dil se khush hungi jab me firse bhgwan ko kahugi k bs ab or Kuch nhi chahiye ye perfect hae life hae mere pass sab kuch hae. Na jane kab. 

Frustration

Kaleshi logo se loneliness bhali 💯

3am Thoughts

pta nhi bura kyo lgta ha jab aapka boyfriend aapse jyada uske friends ko attention or importance deta hai

Relationships

Daman e yaar me mera sar 
Fir ek khaab me mera ghar
Ek ghar ki jisme tum or main
Tum or main ek baat karen
Ek baat ki jisme zikr chhide
Us zikr me hum ahsas kare 
Ahsan kare un lamhon ka 
Lamhe jo humne bune kabhi
Kabhi jo bas ek khayal hai ab 
Khayal ki jisme tanha hum
Tanha maano ek raat siyah 
Raat ki jisme wo baate humari 
Baate jisme khaab mere
Or khaab hi kya bas sath tera
Sath tera ek aanchal sa 
Aanchal ki jiske saye me main 
Saya bhi wo jo daman par 
Or daman me hai sar mera 
Or fir ek khaab me ghar mera

Poetry

So i am working with an ngo there i met this guy . 2 3 baar hi mile hai hum and we went to Pacific after the drive. There i asked him what will you have. He said anything from dominos so i ordered a farmhouse and the minute i opened the box he was just looking at me and said i will not have it i am allergic to mushrooms. He didn't even tell me about this and he just had the drink. I told him to just remove the mushroom topping and have it but he denied. And what else we can do with the pizza i just brought it home . And being an introvert i don't know why am i feeling this awkward meri toh galti bhi nhi thi. Dimaag mein ye hi chal rha hai pehli baar gae the or kuch khaya bhi nhi...


Social Anxiety

Hey suno, 
Ha tum tumse hi bat karni h mujhe
Life difficult lag rahi hai na? Akela mehsoos ho raha hai, jaise kahi fas gaye ho aur tumhari awaaz nahi pohoch rahi logon ke paas.

As pass ke logon ki chalakiyon ka shikar ban chuke ho tum. Baar-baar ek hi sawaal puch rahe ho khud se, "Main hi kyun?"

I know, bahut emotional ho tum, sabko yeh dikhta hai. Lekin tumhare rone pe logon ko drama lagta hai, tumhare aansu unhe tumhari sympathy pane ka zariya lagte hain. Shayad kisi ko nahi pata hai ki tum emotional kyun ho, kyunki tumhare har baat pe rona aa raha hai.

Tum andar se khatam ho rahe ho jab koi thoda bhi pyaar se baat kar le to. Tum us insaan ko apna maan lete ho, use apna bana kar uske liye jo kuch bhi karna chahte ho, vo sab kar lete ho. Lekin phir vo hi insaan tumhe dhoka deta hai, aur tum apne aap se nafrat karne lag jaate ho, apne aapko blame karne lag jaate ho.

Yeh soch ke ki shayad kami tum mein hi hogi, kyunki har baar bachpan se lekar aaj tak tumhe sirf blame kiya gaya hai. Tumhari acchai ko humesha for granted liya gaya hai.

Aur ab se badi baat yeh hai ki tum kisi se help nahi lena chahte, khuddar jo ho tum. Tumhe lagta hai kyun kisi pe bojh banu. Aaj tak itna sambhala hai khud ki, aage bhi sambhal lenge.

Lekin ek baat jo kisi ne tumse nahi kahi hai vo yeh hai ki tum hero ho, tum ek star ho. Tum vo ho jisne apne battles khud lade hain. Duniya ne bahut niche girane ki koshish ki hai, par tumne har nahi mani.

I know, tum abhi udaas ho, abhi lost ho. Lekin yeh time bhi nikal jayega mere dost. Jab yeh sab khatam hoga, tum apne aapko success ki unchaiyon pe mehsoos karoge, jahaan tum jaana chahte the.

Darna mat mere dost ,tu star hai. Tujhse bada koi warrior, koi knight nahi hai.
Stay blessed.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts