Every chance I get I wish for it. It's my dream, my lifelong dream. I pray for it. I wish for it every night at 11:11. But it never came. It never will. Is it too much to ask for? Everybody else gets it. Why can't I? "It" is her. "It" is my dream. "It" is love.

A dream is not a person....you can't work and toil over a person...you must work on you...and hopefully one day you'll attract that persom to you...or you must ..like any other dream..work towards finding it or them...

One Sided Love

I'm 23 and I've been single till now
I've been dating this guy now that I like slightly. But I feel guilty of going into a relationship with him because I feel I'll loose my true self and wouldn't be able to focus on my career 😕

Relationships

Thoughts are real ? Do u agree

Growing Up

Feeling like fucked best friend got another friend,crush don't like me back,i am neglected by my group aand just all fucked up

Depression

When you are so broken. All rubble strewn around. Don't know who or what to blame. Or blame one self. In those dark moments how is a gigantic assertion. But that too pales in comparison to 'WHY'?

3am Thoughts

Happiness is only real when shared

Personal Win

Kaisi Teri khudgarji..
Na dhup chune Na Chaho..

Memories

Really bad time to get sad

Confusion

Lately my mental health has been in the absolute gutter, and it's a lot. I've always struggled with anxiety and intrusive thoughts (which, I didn't realize that was what it was until I got older, but that's absolutely what is), but for the last couple of months I've been struggling with depression as well, and it seems like it just gets worse. I recently moved in with my roommates who I adore - but that almost isn't even good. My best friend recently 'broke-up' with me (we were just friends, but we were, like, the best friends friends could be, since we were very young. Like the same soul in two different bodies) due to her being in a highly toxic relationship and I can no longer contact her. Her family knows about the situation, so I know she is at least physically safe, but she was my 'person'. Then, my now ex-boyfriend's father died, and both of us were so depressed - him because of his father's passing, and me because of "bad brain chemicals" as I like to put it - we decided we could not be together anymore, because we were only hurting each other because we couldn't be there for each other. I don't really have friends, so these were like my two major relationships in life being lost in a relatively short period from each other. I also made some bad decisions with money and my job,  because I was having panic attacks and whatnot, blew through my savings (not that it was so much) and job hopped around before I just ended up at my original place of work (which, I am so grateful to be rehired there. I never should have left.) Therefore, however, I will be late on rent this month. I love my roommates, but I feel like I have been nothing but a bother to them, and now I will be late on rent. I did tell them, so they know and are prepared to cover for it, and after this month I should be okay with my bills again - and I WILL be repaying them for the rent. I just feel like shit. There are so many more details that just make everything worse, but I'm not really willing to share it even anonymously yet. I feel like a lot of my depression comes from these intrusive thoughts, but I feel worthless. My best friend abandoned me, my boyfriend couldn't deal with my mental problems, and my roommates are going to resent me soon if they don't already, and I'll be left with no one. I know that's the absolute worst way to look at it, but that's what it always boils down to for me.  I literally woke up this morning, cried, and went back to sleep. I just need my brain to stop with these intrusive thoughts and I need to get through these next couple of weeks. I don't know if things will be better then, but that's kind of all I've got right now. 

Thanks for reading. 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts